reian's world

I HAVE MOVED

2010-05-03T13:07:00.002+08:00

OH HAI!!! REIAN'S WORLD HAS MOVED

I'm using wordpress now

AREFFIO'S WORLD

time to say bye to an old friend

2009-12-14T11:23:00.000+08:00

I'm leaving blogger, don't get me wrong I love the site. Reian's World flourished to 10k views and some internet credit. I need to upgrade, and since I'm trying to be all professional and brushing up with new technologies and new art styles with design and updates. I've switched over to wordpress http://reichub.wordpress.com is my new current (currently updating blog) don't worry I won't slack off as much this time.

thank you blogger for publishing my 120 posts for 5 years. I am forever in your debt, and thanks blogs.ph for letting Reian's World peak at #50 best for my Ondoy posts. No, I don't like tumbler I'm a traditional Blogger so word press is just right for me. When i get my next paycheck I'll start getting my domain. See ya then.

new site

2009-11-26T13:39:00.000+08:00

I'm helping out at the plant. so about damn time i built up my portfolio and started doing more stuff....well here ya go clean leaf....my attempt on making you web-known

clean leaf site

Here' we be headed...

2009-11-21T16:47:00.000+08:00

Alot of things happening lately, poker nights and massive fights, being all fit and slugging it out with the best. You be designing the best life scheme and try to experience greatness. ok weight update....started the week at 205....now it be ending 189....big improvement...eat a little workout hard...i dunno if i be measuring my body fat...some people tell me i should switch to tumblr for my blog...i might do just that i suppose or make this one really epic...

you havent been around lately?

2009-11-14T03:23:00.000+08:00

Blogs.ph rank dropped down massively lately, actually I haven't peaked at least a 200 since the ondoy posts...why? Simple, been working on my I.T skills and...working out massively, I try to hit the gym everyday, I'm back in shape as I was earlier this year before the major "party mode" kicked in. So here's the deal, this blog is gonna get more personal in the coming months, I'll be keeping an online track on my weight and body fat..weight a weekly basis, body fat hopefully once a month. Late October was when I started religiously working out. I started with a weight of 215 lbs. Yesterday after sweating and all the weight lifting...i weighed 198lbs...not bad right?...I'll take a picture weekly too...and if I'm not too embarrassed I'll post it up here...wish me luck..

artistic boredom

2009-11-10T00:32:00.000+08:00

i was bored here are my new sigs and avi for some forum

avatar

sig

Filipino Time

2009-11-06T06:38:00.002+08:00

November is a time for holiday-themed houses, holiday movies, Undas, Bonifacio Day, and Christmas shopping however, not many people know that November is actually a special month. On October 8, 2008 Gloria Macapagal Arroyo issued Proclamation No. 1638, declaring that November as the National Consciousness Month for Punctuality and Civility as advised by the Organized Response for the Advancement of Society, Inc. (ORAS).

Ponder on the bold and italic texts once more. Punctuality, a strict observance in keeping engagements; promptness. That is a quality not all Filipinos have. Ask a friend, "Pare what time ka darating?", he'll probably answer,"Siguro mga 8 or 9am". See? You must know what I mean right? Saying "mga" before a given time, what does that really mean? You'll get there 5 minutes late? 10 minutes late? 20 minutes late? You can arrive a minute before the hour for all I care, no sense of clarity, absolutely not punctual.

I have a friend that scheduled a basketball game at 7pm, he told us that the schedule was 6pm just so that people wouldn't be late. What kind of people are we to have to be tricked into arriving early? It's a mentality that is clear within our culture, think about it; crowded commutes during rush hour, concerts that start 2 hours later than the given time, people rushing and pushing to get into LRT/MRT trains because everyone's late. We can't always blame traffic on our way to work or school that's a given.

Filipino time, a label that has been given to every single one of us. When I was growing up in the states, dad used to joke around what time my aunt would come, "Filipino time? or American time?" (If you were going to ask, my dad is American) I used to wonder what that meant now as an adult, I understand it completely. We need to develop a respect for time, as apart of our lives and a part of business. Think about highly developed countries, think of a characteristic they have in common. Punctuality, and a discipline to uphold that, every movement is precise and systematic, every minute is efficient and productive. If every Filipino would get this into their system a better Philippines would be over the horizon.

Lets practice this kind of mentality even if it's just for November, try waking up earlier to beat morning traffic, lets be all precise and get to where we are going on time. Lets respect time in our lives and in a business sense. Don't realize this fact before your time runs out.

500 Days of Summer

2009-10-21T18:39:00.000+08:00

You cant describe great cosmic significance to a simple earthly event. Coincidence, thats all anything ever is, nothing more than coincidence. There are no miracles. There is no such thing as fate. Nothing is meant to be. These were the final lines of a movie about love, epic words that my brother and I found to be a lyrical masterpiece.

Last night I was watching 500 Days of Summer with my family, it's a refreshing look on how you interpret the events of your life. We've always believed that everything happens for a reason, whatever is happening around you or within you has a greater purpose. With that in thought I remember a ton of firsts, the first conversation with a friend, the first little league game, the first kiss, the first love, the first phone call we come to believe that all of those firsts all happen for a reason. What if all of that was a mere coincidence? I met my dear friends by chance on the way going home from school, my first girlfriend at a competition which I wasn't even a part of, my knack of writing because of an English teacher.This is truly a debunking of the whole "destiny" mentality people usually have with life, It taught me that when an opportunity comes you might as well grasp it with all your might. A definitely good movie.

The Crappiest News I've Heard in a Long Time

2009-10-20T15:29:00.000+08:00

Modern Warfare 2 won't have dedicated servers, won't have mods, for the PC version. What the hell!? WHY INFINITY WARD WHY!? It's like downgrading from World at War. For shame Infinity Ward...FOR FUCKING SHAME!!

Reian's source:

Call of Duty community manager Rob Bowling, also known as 'fourzerotwo', has confirmed in a podcast that the PC version of Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 will not support user-created mods. Worse, it will not support dedicated servers. PC gamers will have to suffer peer-to-peer connections, just like their console-owning cousins.

Mr. Bowling could offer no defence for this move, and simply stated that: "The team's focusing on having it very equal on every platform" and "We're doing a lot of work on the back end."

Previous PC versions of CoD have supported dedicated servers. Their absence will apparently make the game "much more accessible to the PC community as a whole."

You can listen to the podcast here; skip forward to around the 1:41 mark for the awful truth...

I'm loving how DICE disses Infinity Ward on twitter and says."Dedicated servers FTW. What ever secures a better online experience is a given for us." At least Battlefield Bad Company 2 will backup the PC gamers to the maxi-mondo. The bullshit of all of this is that Infinity Ward wants to make it an equal playing field for all platforms but what they forgot is that PC gamers supported Call of Duty since the very beginning, without the PC CoD4 wouldn't even SEE the light of day on consoles. Thanks for ruining my year Infinity Ward

Rocktober: Appreciate the Classics 60's

2009-10-20T15:16:00.000+08:00

Rocktober 09' is nearing its end, and coinciding with the release of Brutal Legend last week, let's look back on the history of, ROCK, and since it's my blog it'll be my list, my favorites and my kind of music.

1960's
The post Elvis era was the greatness of Rock n' Roll with the British Invasion, was one of the highlights with The Beatles spearheading the assault of UK bands on US soil, The Who soon then followed and a bunch of other. Bob Marley was spreading his influence alongside the Rastafarian Movement, Bob Dylan was developing folk rock, Jimi Hendrix was rocking out! People were high proud and all hippie like, the era ended with the greatest concert ever, Woodstock 69'

woodstock 69'

who are the filipino?

2009-10-15T10:25:00.002+08:00

This morning, I wanted to add some nationalism to my blog post. There's this question in my mind that's been plaguing me for years, "who are the Filipino?", how can you genuinely state your heritage? You might think, "Reian you douche, a Filipino is a Filipino, the food, the culture etc." but no, the thing is that we are so diverse that a load of influences blend in. We are labeled as Manny Pacquiao's hometown people. Our culture is mostly overpowered when we move to a different country. I was born here and as I was growing up was raised in the States, there were so much influence coming from there that I really get absorbed. I came back barely knowing how to speak the native tongue, cousins who were living there barely knew any Tagalog words. I'm saying all this based on experience, before you react hear me out.

First off, nowadays there are varieties of Filipinos around the world, there are Filipino-Americans, Filipino-Japanese, Filipino-Chinese and the list goes on. As a nation growing up, we have so many cultures weaving into our own. The Malays came, the Chinese came, the Spanish ruled, the Americans liberated, the Japanese occupied, the Koreans migrated (I could name so much more). There is such a mix in our culture that we forget to realize what is genuinely Filipino. One major example is our clothes, fashion is purely what defines a person at first glance, we don't have days when girls wear yukatas to watch fireworks like in Japan other than times we were required to at school during the "Buwan ng Wika" festivals. Our everyday attire is composed of western influence, our pop culture is westernized. You rarely see the president wear a Maria Clara to the Palace, or when meeting a foreign diplomat.

Here's my gripe, when immigrating to a new country the tendency of a typical Filipino is to adapt, naturally, hence we are labeled as nice people, awesome and hardworking with alot of Filipino spirit but no cultural influence. You rarely see a Filipino restaurant in the North West Coast or Filipino Fashion trending the global market however, you see Korean movies, Japanese Fashion and Chinese Cuisine all around. The only thing we were really able to produce is, scandals, distress signals, Lea Salonga and Manny Pacquiao. With these in mind I'm missing one massive contribution that the Filipino people gave to the world, People Power; The EDSA Revolution. I do admit that is a great feat, but in my humble opinion it was something that the nation took for granted. Now, when people are tired of the administration all they do is rally hoping for a change even if it was the candidate they voted for. I'll move along and save the EDSA rant for another post.

When does nationalism spark? During a calamity or when the media covers something? I remember someone telling me, "Pare lets repack goods BAYANIHAN NA TO'!" really? bayanihan because of Ondoy? When Pepeng hit the northern part of Luzon where was that "BAYANIHAN" you spoke of? One reason our cultural influence doesn't spread is because of the mentality we have, alot of people are hypocrites. I chose not to help because I don't need to, I donated. I chose not to care because I believe it is a lost cause. 100 people repack goods while ten people donate, yup you people actually think that wrapping up things in plastic bags is helping the environment. One other reason is that Filipinos are too nice. YEAH!! TOO NICE!! When people are too nice they tend to be all submissive. When people are too nice they tend to get absorbed into other cultures hence losing their culture. That's what I think...that's why I still ask all of you, who are the Filipino?

Satan Appears in Church

2009-10-11T22:29:00.001+08:00

I found this story online....it was creepy...in a way...

A few minutes before the church services started, the congregation was sitting in their pews and talking. Suddenly Satan appeared at the front of the church.

Everyone started screaming and running for the back entrance, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from evil incarnate. Soon the church was empty -- except for one elderly gentleman who sat calmly in his pew without moving, seemingly oblivious to the fact that God's ultimate enemy was in his presence.
"Aren't you afraid of me?"
"Don't you realize I can kill you with one word?" asked Satan.
"Don't doubt it for a minute," returned the old man
"Did you know that I can cause you profound, horrifying agony for all eternity?" persisted Satan.
"Yep," was the calm reply.
"And you're still not afraid?" asked Satan.
"Nope," said the old man.
More than a little perturbed, Satan asked, "Why aren't you afraid of me, old man!?"
The man calmly replied, "Been married to your sister for 48 years."

original post

On a different note, here's something completely random I was browsing around blogs and found an interesting picture.

It looks like a typical family picture right? Look closely, The girl in the middle is not alive. Look at the position of her hands...

Tobozalukba wrote:

"This is a Petrolia post mortem photo by Robson . It was extremely expensive to have a photo taken during Victorian times. Only the wealthy could afford such a luxury. If a child or other loved one died it was a common practice to have a photo taken either alone or as in this case with the family especially if there was not yet a living likeness. If you look closely you can see a base behind the girls feet and a post would go up from that with clamps at the waist and neck and the clothing would be open at the back. The arms would have stiff wires running at the back to hold them in place. Also notice the strange placement of the hands. The pupils are painted on the closed eyelids. It was not until after ca.1900 with Mr. Eastman's film process that photography became available inexpensively, as we know it today. Post mortems were very common in Victorian times and if you look closely at portraits from pre ca.1900 you may have one of these photos. This photo ca.1888"

Ok, that was creepy I admit, here's a typical family picture for you guys.

Secret Base

2009-10-11T05:41:00.006+08:00

Out of all the bands I've listened to all of my life, one made a major impact on me growing up. No, it's not Blink 182, Staind or Linkin Park, it's a band I've discovered much later in my teen years. 2007 was when I discovered The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya, around episode 12 there was this concert episode about a band called "ENOZ", I read the forums that this was to pay tribute to a certain j-rock/j-pop girl group that was at the peak of its career but disbanded in 2005, ZONE. I leave the rest to history.

I never took any Japanese lessons and honestly, I can only make a rough translation of words I've learned from watching anime all those years. But that's the beauty with their melodies and songs, they bridge the language barrier that you feel the message of every song portrayed, just by listening and watching the PVs. I always get flash backs of my fondest memories while listening to ~Secret Base~ I start missing friends, and people I hold dear in my heart. I remember my routes when I listen to Glory Colors, I won't give up on the dreams I've planned myself....

I was late 2 years to experience the band at its peak, 2 years and yet they still captivated a fan through their music. They disbanded for positive reasons, Mizuho the drummer wanted to pursue her studies, Miyu, Maiko and Tomoka couldn't see themselves being ZONE without Mizuho therefore decided to disband. They were a flower that was cut during its prime, 6 years of captivating hearts all over the world. Thank you for your music...

I leave with you the music video to Secret Base and Glory Colors (translation in links).

Secret Base ~ Kimi ga Kureta mono (君がくれたもの ~ Secret Base)

Glory Colors - Kaze no Tobira (風のトビラ　～ Glory Colors)
"The Wind's Door"

thanks for reading, this will truly be my secret base...from reality...

paranormal activity

2009-10-09T09:49:00.001+08:00

hey guys i saw this epic trailer from sxephil, i've heard that its one of the best horror films this year here's the trailer. (you need to be on my blog page to see the trailer so if you're on facebook click the original post link)

Anyhoozle, it's an independent film that was shown in select cities in the united states, so what we need is to VOTE! AND DEMAND!!! Paramount is giving out a deal on DEMAND IT, that if 1million people demand it, they start showing the movie nationwide, after the states , they might release it internationally(depending on the demand).... so. get a-voting people!! we need to make this movie hit Philippine shores!! I'd sure see it...even IMAX the damn thing....whatcha waitin for!? VOTE DAMN IT!! here's the link

VOTE VOTE VOTE!!!

Fairy Tail

2009-10-06T04:56:00.002+08:00

This may be the most anticipated anime of the season. If you are a fan of Groove Adventure Rave you'd definitely love this.

Copy pasta from Wiki
A young sorceress, Lucy Heartfilia, travels to the land of Fiore to join the magical Fairy Tail Guild. Along the way, she meets Natsu Dragneel, a teenage boy looking for a dragon named Igneel. Shortly after their meeting, Lucy is abducted by Bora of Prominence, who was posing as Salamander of Fairy Tail, to be sold as a slave. Natsu rescues her and reveals that he is the real Salamander and has the skills of a Dragon Slayer. He offers her membership into the guild, which she accepts, and they become a team performing various missions for the Fairy Tail guild.

The anime is out on the 13th of October so be ready for the subs like a day after. Anyways, here's the trailer for the show. I'm guessing animations is primarily like Rave, but we'll see...it's getting me all psyched up!

new template!

2009-10-03T05:53:00.003+08:00

i was fooling around with xml, found a tutorial so i decided to practice with the blogger scheme

here's my old template pure old school html

here's my new one (if you are on facebook)

there's a search option and the tag widget. the archives is more sophisticated so it looks better

George Carlin on Life

2009-10-01T19:26:00.000+08:00

"I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, start out dead and get it out of the way. Then you wake up in an old age home feeling better every day.. You get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension, then, when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day. You work 40 years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement.

You drink alcohol, you party, you're generally promiscuous and you get ready for High School. You go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a baby, then, you spend your last 9 months floating peacefully with luxuries like central heating, spa, room service on tap, larger quarters everyday, and finally you finish off as an orgasm.
I rest my case."

typhoon alert

2009-10-01T18:19:00.002+08:00

Well, folks I'm not the informant type but with the traffic this blog has been generating lately, I'm here to help whoever clicks on this blog.

This is Typhoon Parma (Pepeng) gaining strenght at a category 5 level. Wow, if there was a God he must've forgotten us a LONG time ago, either that or He must be PISSED. Anyways, it could be that the plot of Supernatural is real, damn you Sam Winchester!

Stay inside and in case you guys value your work instead of lives, good luck to ya! stock up and stay safe! happy huntin!

oh on a side note I added a new counter, a better one so view counts are back to zilch.

my thoughts on ondoy, please read

2009-09-29T21:11:00.002+08:00

Natural disasters are a terrible thing, we all know that. Floods, storms, blizzards and fires don't choose, they don't care of your race, your education, your social status, or your religion. It's a given that there are hazards in this world and we have to fight them. We've gone to weary with a comfy life that we've forgot the basics of living; survival. I'm not choosing sides that "sinners deserve what happened" or that other guy from PEX that said "kasi tapon ng tapon kayo ng basura kung saan saan." and even that chick that stated "a de-selecting of individuals; only the fit should survive" (here's the link). Enough of that, no name calling no blaming, no one deserved this, no one is free from anything either.

August 2005,Hurricane Katrina hit New Orleans and made a massive flood, ruining an entire metropolis. September 2006 Typhoon Xangsane (Milenyo) and Typhoon Durian (Reming) hit the Philippines with destructive wind power and continuous rains. After taking a direct hit from Milenyo, parts of Manila were in ruins. There's a reason why storms are getting stronger and the floods are getting bigger. When you think about it; Typhoon Ketsana (Ondoy) was not that powerful in terms of rainfall and wind speed, Milenyo and Reming were category 4 storms Katrina was a category 5, Ondoy was merely a category 2 storm. Why would a weak storm like that cause such a massive flood? Think about the 3 past storms I've stated and how constantly year by year it gets stronger or has more water. There are so many changes in our climate, way too much if I do say so myself. Rainfall wasn't totally bad this weekend the problem is that dams released water and broke into the metro, which couldn't be helped. It's not about the drainage either, although water came down it can't stop too much water; overflow is bound to happen. Yes, trash everywhere could be a problem and so much lack of self discipline can make small rainfall into a flooding street but water was too overwhelming even for the best drainage system there are debris from floods too. The only difference that throwing away garbage at the proper locations can make is how fast the water can subside. The message I'm trying to portray that our world is deteriorating. If you watched Al Gore's "An Inconvenient Truth" you'd realize this is a possibility. The sad truth is that it is only going to get worse. We need to step up and try to do our parts.

Captain Planet, if you grew up in the 90's had really pure intentions when it came to preserving our world, other than the AIDS episode, that was just wrong. The PSA's that the G.I JOE make after every episode isn't only for safety but for environmental purposes too. We saw this happening yet we, as inhabitants of our home were too ignorant to realize the mess we've made. A house if not properly maintained turns weak and ugly, a car without proper tune ups turns into junk, a body without proper nutrition is malnourished or obese, the same goes for the Earth. We cared too much about our comfort, our blogs, our buidings, our electronics to care for our trees, waters, mountains and animals. I know I'm at fault too doing so little, when I can do so much. No one is to blame, no one is at fault, there is still time to change the way we all live, being alot simpler than anyone is good in the long run. The camaraderie people have shown these past days are astonishing no social status involved, no one rich nor poor, people have dedicated their lives to rebuild what others have lost. It's really ironic that a tragedy is the only thing that can bring a nation together. For it may be a death of a president or a massive catastrophe. I just wish that this thinking would still be within us after a month or two have past, don't do this because your friends wanted to, don't help out because it is required in school, you're not a bad person if you don't help out no one is to judge you for that as long as you are being true it is fine. I just wish that helping others won't be a fashion statement but something from the heart. My name is Reian, and these are my thoughts.

neighborhood2

2009-09-27T23:11:00.001+08:00

neighborhood2
Originally uploaded by reian19

lol

typhoon!!

2009-09-26T11:52:00.000+08:00

It's an uber rainy saturday Philippines where you at? You must be at some happening place...wet...stranded...and cold. This feels like that time in Harvest Moon, the typhoon roaring, you feel helpless as some of your crops meet their doom. It's been raining non-stop since last night, trust me because I know, why? I didn't sleep.

end of post I don't have anything funny or logical at the moment....oooh i feel light headed...

Flickr

2009-09-24T16:56:00.001+08:00

This is a test post from , a fancy photo sharing thing.

this has no title

2009-09-23T04:44:00.002+08:00

you ever have that feeling of uneasiness? where you can't sleep but you want to?you feel light headed but you fight that urge to close your eyes? it's almost 5 am while im typing this. I have a piano version of BoA's every heart playing in the background. I think adrenaline is pumping in, you feel all surreal and you start thinking of so many things.

you start to think, what to do tomorrow, deadlines, you start to shiver some uneasy feeling of nothingness, where is my life headed and then, sayonara solitia starts playing. (totally inappropriate but im typing in real time)

anyways, back to that surreal feeling of being tired, groggy and lacking any rest. as far as anyone's concern its pretty bothersome. i don't have any deadlines, why i don't sleep is by choice. alot of times i feel empty, like a shell....aching to crack open like a spontaneous firecracker. it's just a depressing feeling, sometimes...i just want to drop down into a deep slumber. a chaotic mess within the depths of a labyrinth, a soul, a charred remain of oneself. guide me through...as the piano plays , as people murmur, as friendships stutter...

the (insert name here) seal of quality

2009-09-13T17:20:00.000+08:00

Does anyone remember the video game crash of 1983? It's that time when there was a massive flood of video games in the market, developers and manufacturers abused the rising industry and over populated it with games and consoles. Publishing control was so overwhelmed that numerous bad and poor quality titles were then released everywhere. Due to this incident numerous game companies were forced into bankruptcy. Two years later, a small Japanese company called Nintendo released our to be childhood gem the NES (Nintendo Entertainment System) a.k.a Famicom in North America revitalizing the gaming industry. Nintendo had this standard system called "The Nintendo Seal of Quality" meaning that all games that are released had to be tested and approved by Nintendo , keeping out crappy games from the market, and no one to exploit the industry once again.
Standards, a word defined "something considered by an authority or by general consent as a basis of comparison; an approved model". Something that keeps the quality of the world. You may not notice it but the abundance of standards in this world is astonishing. Let's say you want to eat somewhere new, a friend suggests a restaurant not known. You go to a place that looks shabby and not appealing, but you eat there anyways and found the food really good. Normally, you wouldn't eat at a place like that but what made you eat there now? Your friend, you trusted your friend not because of your bond, because you are on par with his standards. When he says the food is great then it must be. Schools have standards to follow, the passing grade of 70% They have to uphold the quality of their students. Students need to bare the name of their alma mater so they have to live up to the standards of their school.

We have standards ourselves, from the friends we choose to the clothes we wear. Here's an example of personal standards, remember your first love? Remember that first time you felt that feeling of love with someone and since that was your first you can't help but compare other girls (or guys) you've met after that relationship. It's exactly like that; comparison to something you've grown accustomed to. The kind of standards you have shows what kind of person you are. Simple people go with simple quality clothes and food while high class individuals tend to go with big named fashion and cuisine. Eventually, these things make up who we are inside. It's like asking me what girl I like or what music I listen to. It is our own choice and we live by our own boundaries, you can tell alot about a person with what he chooses. I chose to be an agnostic individual, I love subs but I eat at Jolly Jeeps too, I work out 3-4 times a week at this gym, I love reading manga by... and I like this author's books for the knowledge, you see choices are based on the standards we have. We don't have to follow trends like stuff with 3 stars and a sun, yellow shirts or red and black dogtags. We can branch out to become our own individuals, just like what we've been doing since the start right?

If you're reading on facebook I need blog hits, go to http://reiansworld.blogspot.com .

stereotypes are everywhere lol

2009-09-10T19:45:00.000+08:00

Try walking around for the day, walk to crowded areas like malls, train stations, lunch areas, the gym, anywhere. Now, stop and look at each and every single one of those people. Don't stare, its not polite just look. If you are anything like a human being you'd be filled with opinions about those people. That chick over there looks hot! WTF!? that's her boyfriend!? Dude! cool shirt! That guy with the neon green pants and pink top looks like a total douche. I don't know if its normal to other people but I certainly do it. It's human instinct! It's human to criticize. I suppose that's why we have stereotypes.

Yeah stereotyping is a touchy subject, but we as people, strive to find a place we "fit in". If you're into technology obviously you get along well with techies. You love to play DotA hence you love hanging out with people who also play DoTA. You're a car fanatic so the most logical thing to do is join those auto clubs. You care way too much about your grades henceforth you are currently lacking any social life whatsoever. Stereotyping is like a wolf looking for the right pack, you know where you belong the moment you see them. It's really funny, ok to further prove my point. Think of your most trusted peers, You've thought of your "tropa", "barkada" right? Think of what you guys love doing together. Some may like to perform dance numbers, others might just chill at a fave resto, guys might play basketball or any sport on a weekly basis, you may have drinking sessions, play the same game, read the same book, debate on the same side and even purchase the same meal, odds are you all share a common interest. Why do you like these individuals? Because of your interests, because you belong with them, because of stereotyping.

It's normal to stereotype people according to the social status quo, even High School Musical explored that topic. That's been done over and over and over again jocks hang out with other jocks, some emotastic people just stay emo, musicians rock out with band members. I want to brush up on a different approach. ONLINE stereotyping. It's still a really small list but it might make you smile a bit. It may be wrong, it may contain offensive things but you know what!? That's why its a good list.

Reian's personal "the type of people you see online list":

Bloggers - Let's start this list off right. Bloggers are people who like to write about anything, you share your thoughts, photos, some emo diary entry, you web log! These people are often informative like sharing some tips, some analysis, others upload cheats or exam leakage and some are just freakin' emo. These are a cool, collected and pretty generic type of net user.

Anons - Anonymous are one. You know how retarded Internet humor is right? Now it may sound like something a retarded 14 year old write or post, but the internet is for people who like to act like retarded 14 year olds. Hence 4chan, the birthplace of everything "LULZY" on the web. Memes are spawned here, terrorists are born here and hate is its very foundation. Go against the lulz and they go after you...

Pirates - These people are online or not but one thing is so freaking sure, they have a torrent or something abusing the FTP constantly on. You know them, "damn this movie is awesome! can't wait to see it!", "I know I downloaded it two days ago.".

Lets dig deeper into the social thought pattern

Facebook, is really incredibly popular at the moment, heck, even my mom wants to "friend" me on it. There are alot of different people on it too! You can see them daily on your news feed.

Facebookemon Trainers - You know those people who want to "catch em' all"? Those who have 1000+ friends most of them they don't really know. Yup, those people.
Facebookemon - Those people who are added for a +1 friend count value, you don't know them in real life, you just add them up.
Satus Whores - There's a status whore in all of us. We love updating our status messages, like, "I just came from the can, man I took a huge ass shit!!" or , "FML I lost my phone", especially couples, "I miss your hugs dearie". Spewing those constantly, It's amusing at the same time its annoying.
Tag-a-rooonies - Say you had some time to kill so you ended up opening your facebook, you see this notification that you've been tagged by this one person in his note. Your boredom takes over and you start getting irritated because the note spewed nonsense and now you feel pissed or amused (your choice).
Tony Montanas - Those who constantly play Mafia Wars...nothing but Mafia Wars on their wall.
Fahmaaahs - Farmville, Barn Buddy, if these games were real our economies would be so up.
"them" - Those people who migrated from friendster, you know them. Those who write with a mix of upper case and lower case letters "pA aDd f0H nG fS " (some guy told me about this, Jo) according to sources they stay in chat rooms adding people up, some socio pathic people who have no breeding. You know, the squatters of the net.

Tweeting is something to tackle too, but that's a given almost everybody tweets one way or another right? No flaming or spamming, If you have any opinions on what I've written just give me a comment, it'll help my next posts. Thanks for reading!

lately...

2009-09-08T09:15:00.002+08:00

Well, things are slow at the moment. I choose to just chill for most of the days, practicing programming, hopefully doing small jobs and some art work for cash. I don't go out THAT much at the mo, I stay relaxed, reading and doing some productive stuff. Although, I do get drunk once or thrice a week that's nothing new. I finally took the liberty of upgrading my phone, had my motorola v3i like for eternity now, I'm on a nokia e75 now, and the twitter and facebook updates are freaking mobile now haha.

Was gonna sell my car, for some cash since I rarely use it now. But parents told me just get a new one, might find a nice SUV or pick-up that suits my tastes, since I've been driving the pick up most of the time and not my car.

DJ's friend is selling their computer shop, I was trying to convince my friends that we should get it, the place is big like a two story house with alot of space. The downstairs a computer shop while the upstairs is a potential hangout. I dunno, plans are still up in the air, not sure if I'll pull through with it at all but, it's nice to think of something future related.

the sporadic rolex

2009-08-24T01:16:00.005+08:00

Life can have its major ups and downs. Life can be forgiving and unfair, Life can have its rewards and have its shit. Well, life in general is infact a state of growth. '

That's the beauty of it though, life is a sporadic mess of tragedy and euphoria. There was once a boy who constantly indulged himself with video games and anime, a kid whom thought of a life making or designing his passion. Then ended up thinking of all the cynical things, provocative issues, having this urge to at least try and save the world the crazy idealism of being young being at such a tender, tender age and time. Ah time, no matter how cliche' it may sound the only constant thing in this world is time. It's always there, changing second by second, our heart is pumping and aging every nanosecond we live. The beauty of life is through time and age, the fear and ugliness of life are through time and age aswell.

Time could be crucial, time could be wasteful, time could be short, time could be eager approximately any kind of word could be associated with time, banana time, train time, sexual tendency time, time for me to throw up. You see? Like or not Time is an anagram of Life. If anyone bothered to read this and asked themselves, "What the hell are you talking about you douche!?" give me the next paragraph to explain myself. You see, it's more simple than it seems. Remember that bunny from Alice in Wonderland? The one that says ,"I'm late! I'm late! for a very important date!". He's right you know, everyday someone must feel like that, someone must've woken up later than the usual and went to work or school fearing to be tardy. Remember your quiz in a major subject? The one with the "time limit"? Or remember that time you wanted to switch up your processor because this one was faster and could do more in less "time". I could fill up this blog post with nothing but those kind of analogies. So, what does this have to do with anything? Everything.

We basically all live under an ultimatum, we don't have a clue when our timer stops ticking unless, you have something like this.

Well, as dumb as it may seem. We are constantly living and that doesn't last forever. I don't want to waste my time anymore, I took time for granted, like what I did to my thesis mates I procrastinated beyong stupidity, I held back a friend for nothing it was just because I was being relatively super lazy. I did my best to make up for it when we hurriedly finished it for graduation. Thank you Jho, Kevs for forgiving me, and to Mic and Ray thanks for all the help. I don't want to be that kind of person no more, nor be someone like my dad who wanted more money yet forgot that we, his kids grew up already. I don't know how long I have on this earth. But I still want to help change it, even if just sharing my thoughts with all of you I may come to achieve this absurd task, I'm truly grateful.

the post grad post

2009-08-22T18:28:00.002+08:00

Actually, the past couple of days have been fine, awesome, or whatnot. Well, with twitter feeds and wallposts. Also; the text greetings, last thursday it may be aware that I've just graduated college. an awesom feat to finish.

It was cool, I'm gonna miss my college friends though. But, because of the web we're still keeping in touch right fellas?

Anyways my dad said he'd fly back just for my grad and to my surprise, he did. Lots'o good things happened I guess. My dad, didn't finish my graduation(he left pretty early) so I was saying what was the point of his flying back then? Was I used as a scapegoat or excuse? He said jetlag, but wasn't he already aware of that? The PICC had pretty comfy seats. Anyways he kinda kept me hanging I was ok, a little disappointed but OK. I mean he did say that he had to leave in front of my friends. Which is really embarrassing.

Another thing, we(HS friends) partied after grad. Me looking spiffy in corporate attire. we drank at the mall of Asia. And we talked smack at each other till the break of dawn. It was awesome.

Well, till yesterday. We wanted to have a kinda cool celebration for me and dad's bday. I was still upset at him and he was acting all high and mighty that he didn't do anything wrong. It was clear in my words that I wasn't fond at him that moment. I kept avoiding my douchebag father he kept trying to talk to me all casual somewhat about some FAIL business plans and other things he has no clue about. I was at my limit and I wanted to keep cool just have the "LEAVE ME ALONE" plastered on my forehead. But he had to keep getting in my face. So, I really blew up. Man I said some things I really want him to hear, I wanted him to know I was upset, I wanted him to think of the last time he fulfilled his fatherly duties. He just flared up at me yelling "thank you for ruining my fucking birthday" deep inside I wanted to say "thank you for ruining my graduation". He stormed off yelling that I don't want him to be my dad anymore, I said no such thing. He's too insecure that he puts words into his mind, words of sorrow and fucked up meanings.

My dad is pretty much a lost cause at the moment. So, Lets just drink to ease the pain.

/end of emo-ish rant.

time to start up the old blog again.

2009-08-20T01:28:00.002+08:00

For a very very long time, I've finally stopped blogging all together. School got hectic, girl issues, started to party more, started to do more things with life, you know typical stuff like any normal guy would do. Then it struck me, I've wanted to make a name for myself as a web developer, wanted to test my skills in design, wanted to share my life and my thoughts with everyone! Hence OK! let me revive my old blog, my old old blog. Reian's World. Not to brag or anything during the two years of its uber activeness i really did get alot of hits. So, from here on out. after the massive update with the visuals and codes I'll be making a better, brighter and cooler blog. Alright? LETS GO!

poverty pushstart button and others

2008-02-15T14:28:00.003+08:00

It's most likely that you'd call me blasphemous by stating facts I've learned from watching George Carlin stand-ups. I don't blame you, living in a country where religion is everything I just managed to think out of the box.

Maybe I am totally wrong with my points but you can contradict to my statements however you want and I'll listen too.

Poverty:
Most Filipinos say that they are in poverty, actually you know who to blame for this? religion! people tend to pray more and indulge themselves in all the false hope that a savior will come down and give them the life they deserve. Its like teaching people to pray more than to work with all your capabilities. That's why people tend to move out of this country since the belief of an invisible man is pulling them back. The church is in serious shit I tell you. Complaining about every possible thing.
a.Prostitution
Due to people living in slums and uneducated people can't make a decent living, alot of females are resulted to sell pleasure to thrill seekers. This i don't get and i agree with george carlin with this one, why is prostitution illegal? Isn't giving a guy an orgasm a less problem than killing him? It's legal to give away for free and illegal to sell? wait a minute hold on, what if you walk into a store and just grab anything you want and walk out without paying, isn't that illegal?...you guys might think I'm evil and that's ok, a blog's a blog man i can write anything here.

Religion
I always thought that religion made us weak. Anyone remember that Filipino bastard who almost got his head chopped off? That's a prime example of our country's weakness. "The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the one" unfortunately our president doesn't think that and decided to pull out our troops, douchebag. Besides that moron wasn't supposed to be there in the first place! what kind of idiot decides to go to work in a place that's being bombed? EPIC FAIL!

i'll add more when i feel like it...

hearts and bruises

2008-02-15T14:02:00.003+08:00

as you all know hearts day has just past and...my day went really well except for my ankle sprain which made it really hard to walk. so not being able to walk nor drive without excruciating pain i was not able to go to school today...damn

kept my ankle elevated higher than my heart to relieve the pain and eventually heal it, didnt have school on Wednesday nor Thursday so im basically free for the weekend was only able to miss a day. haha it's not like me to be soo worked up about school...

anyways vday was awesome, nothing uber pricey since the 14th is just a date where the flower shops give you a price boost. i only gave my gf some honmei chocolate, not exactly home made honmei but chocolate nonetheless (you'll get what i mean if you watch anime) it was cool except for the fact that my brother was all so jealous in some ways wahahah...but being a good bro that i am i just ordered out so they could get some treats too.

and yeah i am also waiting for smash bros. brawl....

1st post in a long while...

2007-11-30T15:55:00.001+08:00

ever since i linked this blog up with my multiply account been lazy to ever post...not as creative as i used to be anymore, things change, people change, i change....might steal a new skin off of blogskins.com in a while to have free time to actually make my own template...

first off, been really feeling uber down, like the feeling of apathy taking over me. it's not because of school, school's great besides the fucked up cisco professor i'm having a blast, not because of friends or anything it's a REALLY discreet family ordeal, if i have the guts i'll post an article about it...

here's the mushy part,

you know the feeling of being down and have it in your heart that ONLY one person can actually become your one true savior? yeah i guess it's about love again right? (told you it was mushy) i've been having that feeling for a while but not that i think of it, i guess it was selfish of me. i know i need her she knows it too, she likes comforting me but, hates it when i'm really down and being all pessimistic, i got so desperate to be with her to the point that i wanted her to lie....

lie.......to be......with me? damn reian what's wrong with you!? well as deep as my heart goes here's a humble apology, hope you get to read this...(other readers if there are any hehe this part stays private)

New blog haha

2006-12-17T18:31:00.000+08:00

ok ok, instead of uhmm, updating my old blogger account, i decided to blog here from now on, or just link the two, so there, enjoy!

a simple monthsary gift

2005-10-28T19:17:00.000+08:00

hmm....poured so hard this morning and being exhausted from last night...i decided to take a break from school....

i know i could've done more and probably just went to the "enigma" party but no....i didn't, i just stayed home and rested...hate this MIT quarterm...

...ahh 8 months...last time i posted on the 28th of a month was in april...*i think*well here goes...
hehe my thoughts are pretty clouded right now...and i can't express myself clearly but i'll try my hardest...

being in my first ever relationship with someone i really like...made me think..."what should i do"? or "am i doing this right?"...but as it progressed i soon figured out that there are no rules...and all you need to remember was... 1. love her and 2.be yourself....that's why she fell inlove with you in the
first place...was because u were being yourself....

whenever you're with her you feel ever so happy....soon you realize that you're happiest at that same moment....and feel so incomplete when you part...

then you start talking to her on the phone nonstop....at night, during the day...even early mornings...you feel comfort whenever you hear her voice....and then you soon feel that you can't go a day without talking to her...

....love is like that....

ups and downs are also a factor....
you win some...you lose some...having to understand everything....understanding that she can't always be free, she can't always be there for you...you cant always spend time with her no matter how much you miss her.....
it has limitations you must follow.....forcing you to wait.....sometimes longer than expected...

there are disappointments and they really can be heartbreaking....but those are "challenges" i guess that we must overcome....even if your prayers aren't answered...

mistakes you've made come and haunt you....and you really start regretting them by the moment...when this occurs you can't sleep .... feel as sorry as possible for the sin committed...

well...that's how i felt the past 8 happy months....
sorry for the crappy present tricia....for all the mistakes i've made and all the times i wasn't there for you...for the disappointments and everything...

thank you for the love....love you alot ^^ i miss you too...happy monthsary...

.....sigh

2005-10-18T19:53:00.000+08:00

a cross i bear within i fight,
i've lost to darkness,said goodbye to light.
i drift endlessly and wait for despair...
for the patience of death i tempt to dare...

i look above the dark night sky,
for all i've been was one big lie...
i am nothing and nothing i shall be
only my dissappearance can comfort me...

i wish it to end my suffering begone...
i do not want to see another new dawn...
i'm hated by many...by family and friends...
no one to turn to my own wounds i mend...

no comfort of loved ones, so cold and alone...
in solitude i live, my dark skills i hone...
i fight my sorrow and suppress my pain...
my tears as they fall my effort in vain...

my heart is bleeding, my feelings i write
my tormented mind foresaw my plight...
this melancholy poem may be my last...
for before a new day i am part of the past...

divisions

2005-10-17T22:48:00.000+08:00

it took me quite a while to think up a new topic to write about...my thoughts have been clouded lately...there are ups and downs...laughter and tears....oh, and a long commute home...

when you think about society it's always been divided yes? the rich, the poor, the middle, the inner filling...you're either one or the other...the so-called "status symbol" everyone looks at....you wear this brand you buy there, you eat here, drink coffee there...it's what everyone looks at...it's pretty pathetic to judge people for what they wear, where they eat or what they have...just remember the immortal saying, " dont judge a book by it's cover"...

society's pretty messed up nowadays...families are divided into localities, it's either you're in the urban city "barangay" or in a high security "subdivision"...that doesn't stop there... in the barangays you're either legit or in the "squatters area"....
kids are classified into "educated" or "not educated"....
schools are classified into "public" or "private"....
and believe me it goes on...

actually...i didn't intend to write about "society" as a whole in this post...i'll write about that later on...
i spend lots of time at my school lately during my break i realized something....

it has come to my thought that there are a bunch of classifications of students...not just in MIT but in any school...
i'll give out all i can for now...
here i go :

*the scholars - yeah they're the perfect start...smart kids that pay less tuition because of their scholastic achievement...rock on scholars!!

*the nerds - ok ok these type of people have no social life whatsoever...they know one topic and one topic alone....school...they're the type of guys that'll correct your every mistake...answer your every question...
-nerds have 2 classifications in my books :
a. smart-ass - they'll correct you alright...they'll make you look like an idiot too....
b. nice - self explanatory....

*the jocks - ahh they ever-so-loving sports heroes of the school...the varsity players...i dunno but it seems like if you're a player for your varsity team...it's kinda like an elite title...

side note: i dunno why stereotypically, jocks are the dumb sports buffs that think they're kings or the pretty boy heart throb that are always shown in teen movies....modern jocks (at least the ones i know) arent really like that...

*the snobs - self explanatory...mostly made up of girls...the group who *think* that they are the prettiest among the bunch...

*the plastics - hehe a relative of the "snob species" well this group composes of people that think they're hot but in reality they wont admit it...people that are full of lies that they've lost their true identity within them...(i could've just put this in the "snobs" section but i want to make this post longer hehe) just watch mean girls i guess...(i havent hehe)

*the student council - the government within one campus...you get the idea....

*the dancers - you guessed it...they dance...

*the journalists - cant have a school paper without em....

*the actors - do i even have to type!?

*the singers - ....guess what they do....

*lovers - yeah those who go to school not only for the fine education but for love aswell hehe

*the techies - ahh the techies....the computer guys, the people you run to when your pc acts funny...guys that have mp3 players and laptops *looks in the mirror*...nuff of these guys...hehe

*gamers - every school has gotta have a large population of gamers...guys that can talk for hours on end about final fantasy or tekken...you a name a game...they know em...

*otakus - haha there are also alot of anime junkies out there...anime...anime....anime...w00t!! people who live and breathe anime :D...

*book worms - people who escape reality by book...:D

*class clowns - guys that love making the class laugh...at any occassion....ANY!!!

*perverts - they are real....unfortunately...

*class dunce - slow learners.....SLOW!! hehe harsh...

*lazy bastards - they love doing work...NOT!

*stereotypes - ....you know what they are...

*bullies - the lowest of all animals....those pathetic wretched big boned morons....

no matter how much you think of it we are what we are ...see which class you are in...( no biggie you can be in whatever class you wish... an otaku/gamer/lover or an scholar/gamer)
hehe that's all i can think up right now....if you want me to add some stuff feel free to comment or uhmm tag...:D

disappoinments

2005-10-02T13:39:00.000+08:00

it seems like i only get to post once a month nowadays hehe...i've been down in the dumps for a while now...my whole break feels...worthless...

it starts out with me failing both my math class...i did try and i know i tried all i could to pass but it wasn't enough.....i'm just dumb when it comes to math...i stink...
i've been down about that and i kept thinking about it all week but...i only feel more sorrow...it's like im being pulverized inside...

now, this term i get to take up trigonometry and college algebra again....damn....

it doesn't stop there though....
emotionally and personally it gets worse...

have you ever waited for something for so long only to find out that you'll only have to wait longer?....well to keep it simple you wait and build up excitement for something only to get disappointed in the end...you know that feeling right?...

that's how i feel at the moment....

i try everyweek and lately everyweek....it's always a "no"....yeah i do get upset and i try with all my might to keep a positive perspective on things....weeks pass by and still i get a no...it always ends with an "im sorry" and me saying,"it's ok" but why does my heart feel crushed?...
heck for a guy like me...i even cry at night...
i keep wondering why?....or what i have done wrong...or how life's unfair...or maybe it's karma...the thing is what did i do to deserve this?...

i guess ron was right....it's really hard for a guy to show his true feelings.....or is it because i've learned to keep everything to myself...

why do i wait only to end up waiting longer?...it's hard...and it's not exactly getting easier...it gets harder by the day...

as i've posted before....waiting is life's essence....all i can do is wait longer....

i guess i'll have to keep trying then...:)

sorry about the messed up entry fellas...it's just...i had to let it out...even if it were by means of jumbled words

cluttered thoughts of friendship

2005-09-07T11:43:00.000+08:00

a new month and my friends, it's time for a new post. College has been great, tough, but great....new friends new classes and new hardships...*sigh* im starting to miss highschool but this is way better...

well now time for a new post...one thing that irritates me always are friends that "call" you a friend but actually want something in return...something for school, money, a favor...it's so pathetic...it's better off saying "lets be friends cuz your so smart" or "you have money i'll stick with you"...hmm the funny thing is...some of my closest friends are like that heck they told me once..."you're our friend cuz you have money" they told me that was a joke but heck that hurt...but...there are times where it's too much but there are times where i owe them alot...

my barkada:
ok for most of the jamers that read this and know me somehow...we call ourselves "alphabeto" i have no idea why but we just did...
we consist of talented individuals and weird wacky guys....oh...we all eat alot too (ask my mom)
our team builds up of:

Arron Merjudio - to us he's "ukab" hehe this guy's my so-called "pakner" we do everything together. he's this lazy in academics but electrifying at basketball guy.we go mall hopping and movies yeah i also miss those RO days of ours he spends lots of time at my house and we play ps2 and or RO...he's now a tamaraw and studies at FEU (far eastern university)

Jenus Bautista - hmm "enus" for short he's the journalist in our group...he had this column in our senior year school paper...he's this basketball addict he got game but i wont say so otherwirse hehe...he spends alot of time here i remember once, he spent the night here but he had to work on his group paper till 12 midnight, he came to our house around 1 am everyone's sleeping....believe it or not he climbed up our terrace!!! hehe oh and before i forget of all the guys in our barkada he eats the most!!!w00t everytime at dinner whenever we eat he's the first to sit and last to stand up!! hehe i owe this guy alot...well i guess it's vice versa...thanks man!!! hehe he won that character portrayal contest in our senior...he's a great actor..he played poseidon...he also studies at FEU.
just dont abuse what you have, enus...:)

Von Laderas - he's a multi-talented mofo with a wacky attitude , he's the comedian in our group and my brother. we spent more than half of our highschool life together, yeah....ever since our 2nd year of highschool he's always at my house...we do everything together, the mall, a whole day of RO or PS, projects even if we are different sections. he's my parents' "adopted" son hehe, he's the point guard at basketball hehe as he always says. we go to school together in our sophomore and junior years. i remember watching either "the simpsons" or "cooking master boy" before going to school hehe at times we get to school late hehe. he also has tons of absences per quarter...he has his so-called "sked" hehe mousetr@p w00t!!!! he was the only one that had a case of arson in our group!! hehe it was wacky but funny!!..he has this impact on everyone because of his "kulitness"-_- (hehe yeah tricia, i made up my own word again!) he's in cavite now and he studies at EAC (emilio aguinaldo college) miss ya von! and take care of khate!! hehe

Lorenz Talal - ahh if you want a chinese man with you he's the guy! we call him enchong or simply chong, his shots on the court are sure balls!! he can make the basket even with his eyes closed!! seriously!! he likes superman...in fact he likes him alot!! he studies hard....and follows the rules...whenever we get in trouble...he doesnt....awkward...-_-...we both like the misads of maverick and ariel...he's maverick and im ariel....we had this contract in 3rd year that i get to kill him on sept 22 2004 ...but we had no school that day so...he gets to live....hehe he now studies at MCU (Manila Central University)

Marco Manio - otherwise known as "pando" hmm he has this badboy attitude and he's the chick magnet...damn even gay guys dig him! he's this romantic guy that cares ever so much for his "shayne" i remember whenever we go home together he asks me "mayaman na daan" or "mahirap na daan"? hehe because i spend an extra 10 php if i chose the "mayaman na daan"...he quiet but he pranks are retarded yet hilarious at times....he cuts up these bandages eveyday to cover his pimples....EVERYDAY! ...he loves the coke float....everytime we eat at mcdonald's he orders a float hehe...he a big guy and plays great basketball...kudos to him!! hehealong with enchong he also studies at MCU now...

Jonathan Namay - i remember back in our freshman year people always thought we were brothers. Namay was always this happy fellow...just dont get on his bad side...hehe...he rocks in basketball and he's pretty corny with his jokes...he's a proud FEU tamaraw now hehe...

Alfredo Raymundo - he's pretty cute...others know him as this clown jester...hehe and he's a pretty good actor too...he always talked about being a pilot someday and yeah...he might even become one...kudos aped kudos! studies at airlink

Carlo Guitones - ahh now here's a guy that has a this magic bodypart that everyone loves...he and his magic kuntil...he's a kickass dancer and...has a pretty hard time with the ladies but heck...he's adorable in his own weird way...also studies at FEU

well this is the only things i can say for the moment...hehe till next post

KP

2005-08-24T14:59:00.000+08:00

http://www.angelfire.com/rpg2/chrono_leonheart/Could_It_Be.mp3

poverty in my own words

2005-08-01T17:41:00.000+08:00

i was walking around luneta with my family the other night and something bothered me....

i look around and at every direction i see homeless people....some with kids alot were senior citizens...reality and it's cruelty have shown...poverty is rampant everywhere...i pity them but i dont help...i feel powerless...but i have power....it's strange in a way that morality is taught in schools but unless we are obligated to perform these acts of charity we do nothing..
think about it..think of your school and how every student acts, we do these things because we are graded you wouldn't see every jamer give away their clothes to some kid....nor a mapuan give his daily allowance to a beggar...we somehow contradict to the very teachings of morality itself....it's not just the students but also the teachers. see the school , in order to fund their charitable events they smooch off of their students...it's publicity...there are only a few good people that still live for virtue...the others they're obsessed with material things...

i admit i am not one of those people....im not righteous, im no saint...i have material possessions and i live of off technology...it's awful to admit that the only thing i can give to the less-fortunate is my sympathy....therefore i consider myself.....lucky....

poverty...you can only blame poverty on greed...the way i see it..people from provinces go to the city for one thing and one thing only.....MONEY...they go to cities to find better work and live fabulously like the icons they see on tv...only to figure out that no one would take them in...in other words...they were DEAD WRONG...with no one to turn to they stay on the streets they get a low pay job and struggle in living off of that...back in the provinces they eat 3 meals a day NOW they barely have 1 full meal....it's pathetic...filipinos aren't content making them prone to failure....

poverty leads to injustice and injustice leads to chaos...oki i've played too much dynasty warriors...

how nintendo

2005-07-29T13:37:00.000+08:00

:: how nintendo are you? ::

a simple post

2005-07-24T09:27:00.000+08:00

it's amazing on how simple things can make you smile...the green grass, the blue sky, an e-card, a blog comment, someone you don't like being chased by a flying cockroach (errr)....life's simplicity is its purity...

the feeling of contentment is something God has always reminded us....be thankful for what you have...right? we dont need to ask for more techie stuff (why am i feeling guilty now? hehe) nor be all green-eyed with someone...you need to think "what do i have that he doesn't?" always think about that...whenever you feel jealous with someone think of something he or she can never take away from you...a loved one...your identity....your gift...

anyways back to simplicity....

simple things can make people happy and at times can make them cry right?..it's like me getting my my cardinal plus ID hehe i was almost jumping for joy...i was like "dude lets go out and come back in again, i wanna try out my id!" hehe as shallow it may seem that made me happy....or whenever i open my mailbox and find out that someone had left me an e-card at that moment i feel loved and of course happy hehe...and the occassional hug can do me just fine...:)
why do simple things make me happy?
because im a simple guy...

i know to eat plain food every now and then...heck i love lugaw i know when to share and do ridiculous weird things with friends...heck i know when to squeeze in when the lrt is packed...im simply myself...i dont copy anyone nor pretend to be something im not

it's like when i read this entry from malin's blog...(malin's a friend i met on animetribe) it was about her bus rides from and to her school...and all of her so-called "awkward moments" she mentioned in one part hte pride she felt when she got to her school without any assistance...
i know the feeling....i jumped for joy when i reached mapua IT center in makati on my own...no matter how shallow it may seem....it was a big deal for me and malin....

simplicity has its own beauty...simple gifts, simple smiles, we live this life not knowing how rich we really are

Evanescence - Anywhere

2005-07-23T04:16:00.000+08:00

hmm i've posted a new song for my blog here's the lyrics

Dear my love, haven't you wanted to be with me

And dear my love, haven't you longed to be free

I can't keep pretending that I don't even know you

And at sweet night, you are my own

Take my hand

[CHORUS:]

We're leaving here tonight

There's no need to tell anyone

They'd only hold us down

So by the morning light

We'll be half way to anywhere

Where love is more than just your name

I have dreamt of a place for you and I

No one knows who we are there

All I want is to give my life only to you

I've dreamt so long I cannot dream anymore

Let's run away, I'll take you there

[Chorus]

We're leaving here tonight

There's no need to tell anyone

They'd only hold us down

So by the mornings light

We'll be half way to anywhere

Where no one needs a reason

[Refrain]

Forget this life Come with me

Don't look back you're safe now

Unlock your heart

Drop your guard

No one's left to stop you

Forget this life Come with me

Don't look back you're safe now

Unlock your heart

Drop your guard

No one's left to stop you now

[Chorus]

[Silence]

Yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah

[Fades out]

college w00t

2005-07-22T19:37:00.000+08:00

it's a college post hehe ok...here goes....

hmm....Im a freshie college student....i go to mapua institute of technology (makati campus) so technically im officially a mapuan w00t hehe a mapuan hehe im a jamer/mapuan w00t hehe....

my first week in mapua ...well it's full of ups and downs...i have fun and the occassional frustration and the endless laughs hehe...

hmmm it's all good IMO all the ppl at AT4 apparantly we dont all know each other yet but we're getting there...i've become close to lotso ppl now...hehe we hang out here and there and chill at the tables outside our beloved room...it's crazy i use my cell alot in class hehe i go out without permission and laugh out loud during lessons....NOTHING LIKE HIGHSCHOOL....hehe hmmm ok i'll end this short post now...im not that creative at this moment

i wanna die so badly now....

2005-07-15T17:12:00.000+08:00

im starting to hate my life....i put out lots of effort...i do everything i can...i come early...i finished everything...i came expecting to have a very good time.........but life screws me over...

this always happens....why is it whenever a friend invites me over i come, invites me to go out i come...and eveytime it's my turn to invite them...oftentimes they bail...they say they have other plans...i've always ignored how my friends disappoint me when they do that...

the pathetic thing is....it always happens to me...

today was no excemption...i finished my homework so i wouldn't worry about anything else...i came early...i came there expecting to spend time with her......i was dead wrong....

they were inviting me to her friend's bday...i was like why?... i wanna spend time with her and her alone....what am i going to do in a gathering?...i'd feel out of place...i wouldn't have a good time...i finished my homework the whole morning for me to get permission for her to come...i was stood up....again.....

even though it meant A WHOLE LOT to me if she came with me....i said no....it's her friend's bday the friend that she cares about so much...i couldn't take her away....either one of us was going to get hurt....it was better that it were me...

i love her so much.....i miss her alot too.....the sad thing is...no matter how hard i try...it seems like i cant spend time with her.....this always happens to me......why!?

another ruined day in the life of reian....no one cares about me anyway.....

too afraid to face the truth

2005-07-11T12:51:00.000+08:00

all the sadness i've felt yesterday...drifted away...im getting my nerves psyched up for my first day of college!!! w00t w00t!! hehe all my friends have all ready started and all the guys that go to my college have started aswell...i on the other hand have no classes on mondays so i have an extra day of summer....

anyway, if there's something we've learned growing up our parents and teachers have always reminded us be ourselves...i've written about acceptance a week ago...now it's about accepting one's self...

we live in this world that thrives perfection...we have beautiful people on the big screens, t.v's and magazines...let's face it...they're beautiful and some of us look up to them...but people like us?..the ordinary students, the bloggers, the simple people...we aren't them, we are much better people...we are ourselves...when we get angry, we show our anger, when we are happy and we show that we're happy, when we are sad we show that we are sad....we are imperfect, we are truly the creations of god....

then again there are people that don't like showing who they really are...people that hide behind masks, demand that they are perfect and in the process irritate other people...AGAIN my acceptance theory has made it's mark...what's the point in living that way anyway!?...it happens alot in high-school i tell you that much...but it only lasts till high-school's over...
ok since im feeling a bit happy go-lucky let's make a character to make fun of...hmm...let's call her "joan-a"...

joan-a : hi im joan-a

so joan-a is that typical snobbish bi0tch that shows signs of jealousy and is a frikin bad liar...aren't ya joan-a?

joan-a: "yes i am...im a naughty slutty hoe that hates my life so i tend to make other's lives miserable...i tend to lie alot too...that's because i a love telling stories about how great my life is...all the pretend guys that i make up love me in everything i do..."

that's the spirit joan-a! show us your true colors and how you really feel inside...see ain't being yourself fun!?...

joan-a:"it sure is!"

you make friends and friends accept you for who you are right? why change for the worse? something good happens to your friend.....why do you get jealous? aren't you happy for him or her? aren't you supposed to be a good friend?....this goes on and on and believe me it only gets worse...

hmm so joan-a ..tell me, are you the type that gets jealous?....

joan-a:"i sure am!! *giggles* i am flirty and a retard and guys hate me so i assume a guy likes me and i pretend that he loves me"

ahh so you are desperate for love like my friend carlo guitones?i pity you so much right now....you are so pathetic...i'm glad you are so made-up *insert smirk here*

hmm ok that's pathetic really....those who force love...an infatuation to a whole new level that isn't love at all...hmm are they THAT desperate that they need to make up stuff?...like carlo and his other half milka?...hmm i guess another layer is added to the mix of joan-a's plastic facial...
why rush love and be unhappy?...hmm...im no love expert but at least i dont force people to love...

next lets talk about friendships again..

friends, as they say are forever...true...but what kind of friend are you? dont say that you are a true friend...since it's easier said than done...dont say you're a good friend cause there's no exact definition for that...how can you tell if you're either of the two?...ask your friend yourself...if you've been true to your word..and admitted your mistakes i guarantee you that he/she will tell you what you really want to hear but if you're like this bitch joan-a here...better get some tissues and cry all you want for all i care...

it's not a matter of giving or taking...it's a matter of both...he cant be good to her alone or vice-versa they need to be good to each other...friendships are a terrible thing to waste....

i hope you've learned your lesson now joan-a...

joan-a: "i hope so too"

be true to yourself...that's all this world needs..we dont need anymore J.los nor britneys no shaqs nor t-macs...we need you...i hope this message gets out...

it's not about you all the time nor how you feel...think about your friends how you treat them and how they treat you...treat them nice...they'll treat you nice...everything should work vice versa...no more masks and lies...we shouldn't always TAKE nor should we always GIVE...we should give and take...this is reian uhmm just posting regularly on his blog...OUTTIES!

expecting too much

2005-07-10T14:56:00.000+08:00

that feeling of disappointment is always...sad...no one likes getting disappointed....no one...
one thing i've learned all my life is that i shouldn't expect too much of myself, my friends and my family...otherwise i'd get hurt...

i dunno...i guess it was my fault..did i ask for too much?...i was looking forward to this day...and now i realize i shouldn't have...i've been down...it's like every spec of happyness i felt when i woke up this morning fluttered away...and uhmm to tell u the truth i even cried...my last sunday free...i was planning to have a great time...i was completely wrong...

i expected too much...i ended up hurting myself...

-peace out..

next batch of MP3s!!!

2005-07-06T22:47:00.000+08:00

Carrie Underwood..

inside your heaven

inside your heaven duet w/ bo bice

inside your heaven live *warning it's cut*

new found glory

my heart will go on

2005-07-06T15:40:00.000+08:00

My current Desktop AGAIN!! hehe as of 07/06/05
Posted by Picasa

...hehe..for real!?

2005-07-02T10:42:00.000+08:00

perfect- To you, your girlfriend is the most
important person in your life, you would do
anything for her, and that's why, you're the
perfect boyfriend. Some girls would kill to
have a boyfriend like you, one that always
knows how to make a girl feel special. You
rock! ^0^

What kind of boyfriend are you? (for guys! with pics!^0^)
brought to you by Quizilla

Crispin Boyer's 1UP Blog: WWII games and movies: Not even close...

2005-07-01T17:52:00.000+08:00

Crispin Boyer's 1UP Blog: WWII games and movies: Not even close...

it's pretty amazing ...this WWII story...read it...

my reaction:
i feel that we don't appreciate vets that much.....filipino, american...a soldier is a soldier no matter what..they are the guys who risked there lives for our safety....kudos to all vets!! you all fought well!!....

it's not just vets..think of the soldiers with the fear of death everyday they wake up...those who fight for us to live in a safe world....on both sides....
i quote squall leonhart of final fantasy VIII, "Right and wrong are not what separates us from our enemies. It's our different standpoints, our perspectives that separate us. Both sides blame one another. There's no good or bad side. Just two sides holding different views."

there's no right or wrong anywhere on the battlefield....we all think we're right they think they're right...battles are meaningless

acceptance..

2005-06-29T15:17:00.000+08:00

been thinking lately....
i think about my past year and all the happy times i've celebrated and bad times i've endured...all the memories...some make me laugh,some make me cry, some gave me a reason to smile, some i try to forget...
ironically i was listening to punk rock songs via my player...one thing caught my attention...it was a random playlist and when "perfect" by simple plan played...i began pondering...

the song it's basically all about acceptance...a dilemma of every kid...especially teenagers...making your parents proud of you and...them accepting the fine person you are now...i know the feeling...it's tough...because sometimes parents dont think of their child as a young adult...they think of him as a...child. daddy and mommy just can let go of their little girl....they cant help the fact that their son has grown...im not entirely sure about this...im a kid myself im no parent.

when you think about it...life is almost all about acceptance (great reian first wait now acceptance!?) really....think about it...ok for seniors, they live in fear of not getting accepted to their college of choice right!? for actors they fear not getting accepted for the part, for athletes they dream to be accepted by the pros, for guys courting they long for the girl's acceptance (that one was for my friend carlo)

in the end during the afterlife we pray for our acceptance in the kingdom of heaven....

we want to be accepted no matter what the cost...it's like everyone wants to be accepted by fame, love, wealth, you name it one person wants it....

more importantly...you would want your friends to accept you for who you are..not to be ashamed or be afraid of you when he sees someone....but to tell the world that your friends...no secrets no shame no fear...

it's like this one movie "guess who" (yeah i've used it twice in my blog) this guy wanted to be accepted by his girlfriend's family...and lied in hilarious ways.....see even movies show this kind of thinking...

think about what i've just written...then irony'll take over...you'll see my point...

that wraps it up....

every sword needs its sheath

2005-06-23T13:03:00.000+08:00

it's still my summer break, although my friends are all busy with school...im still here doing pre-college tasks and hanging around...watchin anime, reading manga etc. as i was watching anime and playing my games...i've realized one thing....almost all the great warriors of the anime and game world have one thing in common....they have "nothing to lose".

think about it...look at dante from devil may cry...or solid snake from metal gear solid, look at the white cross from weiss kruez, or the early hitokiri battousai(kenshin himura) from rurouni kenshin, jin and mugen form samurai champloo,heero of gundam wing,...the list goes on, no family nor love interest no reason to exist but to fight...it's acts of boldness and bravery without thinking twice...building up character having that unbeatable ego...defining the term "badass".

something that starts out with the words "justice" and "freedom" with a dash of "power"...starting out simple of defining something to fight about and fighting for it until it gets the better of him. sooner or later he has a conflict with himself like kenshin and kira yamato (gundam seed).

others thirst for vengeance...they have nothing to lose because they have lost everything, look at sasuke from naruto as a prime example, his family was murdered and he made it his goal to avenge them...in fact alot of the comic book super heroes thrive for vengeance, spider-man, batman, the punisher to name a few.

others atone for a sin they have commited, like the white cross from weiss kruez, chrno from chrno crusade, and the prince from the prince of persia.

while others have vengeance and atonement on their minds there are some that have conflicts with their past like a broken promise, a bloody past, felony, or being framed, examples of these is zechs marquese(gundam wing), mwu la fllaga, rala kruze(both from gundam seed) and the two swordsmen from samurai champloo jin and mugen.

although they all fight for what they believe in....they fight for their own cause...there are still...that fight because...of the love of it dante, solid snake and splinter cell's sam fisher do it for the passion...

at first, they all seem unstoppable right? no, in fact every man has his weakness...this is where a quote from katsura kogoro (samurai x vol. 1 trust) is appropriate he said, "every sword needs a sheath". the sword is the warrior...and of course the sheath is someone dear to him.

ahh yes...everyone's weakness....love...it can turn the inhumanlike of all creatures soft... even the most deadly and brutal being into a harmless one...kenshin had his tomoe...she made him happy for the first time in his life, chrno has his rosette where she can stop his demonic rampage, recca has his yanagi giving him the will to fight, kira yamato has his lacus cline,she comforts him in his time of need. the list goes on...

love, in it's comforting ways can harness this power that can either give a stronger will to fight or lose the will to fight...either way it brings eternal happiness...

a guy's ego can get the best of him at times....one's rage in fighting can lead him to his paramount...but how can you stop an angered sword once the battle is finished?...only one person has the power......his sheath...

i may be wrong on some parts...so if you have any reactions...good or bad...feel free to leave thins entry a comment...^_^

more songs

2005-06-21T11:08:00.000+08:00

here's the song every heart by BoA! click! remember right click and save target as....kk..enjoy!

here's some local bands
OPM

Hale - the day you said goodnight

MYMP - tell me where it hurts

2005-06-20T17:46:00.000+08:00

my current desktop
Posted by Hello

birthday post!!w00t!!!

2005-06-16T22:10:00.000+08:00

my birthday's today....and of course it's a very special day for this dark, kakashi-fanboy blogger...hehe i feel so relaxed and...yeah of course i grow a year older, i had a party a few hours ago...friends and family came ...there are some that made it, some that didn't, some were early, some were late...some stayed awhile while some had to go....all those aside i had a blast...

it was kinda different this year...i was getting greetings from lots of different people...some i knew some i dont really know...some i was introduced but i dont really talk to them...even the guys i play socom online with IMed me on messenger and greeted me happy birthday ^^

the party was fun, some of my friends came..... Ukab came EARLY around 2 pm we played an hour of Marvel vs. Capcom 2 and i OWNED him completely i love my wolverine, ken and ryu tag team (i only needed ken and ryu though) and Lorenz and Namay came around 3 pm....around 4 pm i was supposed to pick Tricia up from school which was supposed to be me ONLY...but hehe the group had to come with hehe...we picked her up and on the way to my house we overloaded this tricycle....hehe u have me, my bro jr and tricia inside , namay and my other bro dj behind the driver, and lorenz hanging at the back and ukab hanging from the side...i thought the tricycle was goin to give!! we laughed so hard!!! when we got home hehe ok back to our posts we played marvel vs capcom 2 again while others went online and horsed around....well...Tricia had to go home early so I accompanied her home ^_^ (im a nice guy) .....when i got back jenus has arrived and the room was a mess...damn i was gone for 20 mins and that happens....afterwards we started eating we ate alot hehe and uhmm von called to wish me a happy bday...and after that they all left...my friends... i got tired and stuff...i was happy spendin time with triica and my friends...uhmm im kinda tired ryt now so till next tym

another mp3 ^_^

2005-06-12T10:21:00.000+08:00

someone requested the thousand arms theme song so here it is...:)) ayumi hamazaki's depend on you
once again right click and save target as....

feel free to download

2005-06-08T15:01:00.000+08:00

ok uhmm for the past download...sorry some say it didn't work...so here's a new one simpleandclean

all you have to do is right click and save as...kk enjoy
once again it's utada hikaru's simple and clean...long version in english
here's something cute for your enjoyment as well KIRBY!!

waiting

2005-06-08T11:19:00.000+08:00

all our lives we've been waiting....literally...it's either waiting for the bus, waiting for the bell to ring, waiting to grow up...waiting for summer break...yeah..when you think of it we've waited for everything...funny aint it?

well actually i decided to write about this cuz of deep thinking...and i came out with the realization that..it's pretty funny how much life is about wait...i agree that we should take charge of out own lives but....in the meantime..during our young years when we are still at the grasp of our parents...growing we wait...we wait...we wait and wait...it's like the goal of life is to figure out how to live your life while waiting for death....living is this time gap between birth and death....before any of you contradict to what i have just said..think about it...we're all going to the same path, we all start the same and we will all end the same way...life is merely the long wait and how productive you can be...i don't see the point..but...for now that's the meaning of life right there...we all wait....to meet our maker...

dont get me wrong...i dont mean it as a bad thing or anything...i dont think life is pointless or...meaningless...during our wait...while living...we find out what makes our wait worthwhile...we form bonds by forms of friendship, family, enemies...and loved ones...and they give us the strength to live...
the stronger the bonds the stronger the will to survive is......sooner or later we would realize....that we dont want any of this to end....wishing that death was not real....and that the road of life was a bumpy never ending one...making the wait harder than expected...giving you the urge to live your life to the fullest..
it's either fulfilling a dream, spending it with your loved one, timeless trips with friends, proving something, any reason is a good reason to live...
im only posting from thought...i have no resources whatsoever...everything i've written is my opinion alone...till next post...later

what dark word represents you

2005-06-04T19:27:00.000+08:00

Your word is: Brooding. You are a true thinker and
often try to figure out the meaning of life,
why we are all here etc. You may not be so
social, and often think twice before acting but
those thoughts you have in your mind never stop
flowing in. Sometimes you can be so
concentrated you forget about other things that
you have to do. Don't change, this world needs
deep people.

What dark word represents you? (anime pics and 7 outcomes)
brought to you by Quizilla

..happy again

2005-06-01T20:40:00.000+08:00

the start the june...the very first day marks off my last month of vacation and boy! it's been one helluva day! well, all the problems i had 2 days ago...washed away and...im fresh...im happy im me again! hehe

well yesterday, everything fell into peices...the puzzle that was shattered on the 30th game back togather on the 31st...i was willing to forget the incident and move on...starting anew and filling happy memories as i move...ok, we went to laguna yesterday...we went to this resort..."la vista pansol" hehe we've been going there yearly for almost 5 years now...we like it there...so dad made reservations on monday and totally forgot my sagala on tuesday...no biggie though...although they say that the girl i was supposed to escort was uber cute...that much attention doesn't suit me...
so anyways, we head off to pansol yesterday and spent the night there...we swam and messed around a bit...went down the slide a few times..and swam some more..swam during a thunder storm and..swam a whole lot more...hehe

ok...we had fun and i woke up this morning eagerly counting the hours till tricia's bday party/get-together...i was afraid that i wouldn't be there on time since we left laguna around 10:30 am...and we were supposed to meet around 12:30 noon....yeah plus i had to get dressed and stuff...i was scared till we had excellent timing nearing roxas blvd. around 11:30am i thought that i could still make it...until dad decided to pickup my cousin kevin's suit somewhere in quezon city...i was like "WHAT!?" but couldn't react...we got stuck in traffic we entered the dreaded street known as "ESPANYA" hehe so yeah got to the tailor around 12:30 (the time i was supposed to meet tricia) and...i almost lost all hope till i called her....maybe she loves me or...maybe it's just coincidence but...she told me that they would leave at 1:00 pm...i was shocked!! all the hope i lost returned and we sped through traffic coming home...once on the ground on the front gates of our house i ran towards the bathroom and took a nice fast shower(ok i still took a shower it may have been fast but it was still hygenic...) i ran out put some clothes on "neatly" and called tricia to say im on my way...:)
i did make it in time and...i was kinda embarassed for them having to wait for me but...yeah...i was glad i got to spend time with her 2 days before her special day...like an advanced celebration....so we got to the doughnut shop and we did arts n crafts : hehe...my dinosaur rocked!! and we ate doughnuts and...they were yummy too...ok...after that...we headed home...well tricia wanted me to give some doughnuts to my family (hehe...she did me one better...cuz honestly im not the "pasalubong" kind of guy*im so ashamed*) hehe once i got home they ate em all...and they really liked it...so...hehe wow more cello customers :)).... right now im beat...i barely have my eyes open and ims till in front of the pc chatting and writing on this...maybe i'll rest for a bit...so...anyways my day went great....and wow im happy again :)

...

2005-05-30T16:57:00.000+08:00

today has been a dark dark day...yesterday was great we went to von's house blessing in cavite i saw jenus, ukab and namay and of course von and we played basketball and fooled around, even my cousin kevin joined the fun...coming home we rode at the back of the pickup truck we helped two mormons and the trip from cavite coming home we laughed, sang songs and talked...i had my friends over afterwards, jenus and namay eventually went home while ukab spent the night...i had a blast yesterday...i talked to trish..had fun with my friends and..it was a great day
Sunday now is eventually part of history, today has been tearful for me...i'll fill you all in...

as i said, ukab spent the night...we were fooling around earlier after we woke up then we decided to get some food from downstairs...that time my parents were printing these pictures..but the noticed we were short of photo paper and i being the pc guy i am tried to compress them, my first attempt were failures and...eventually we found some more photo paper...we could've just printed it on word which kevin already made but mom wanted it to look differently..she said "where's the document!?" i said "it's on the task bar" she started yelling more...then she wanted to open powerpoint she kept yelling and yelling that she cant find it...i told her "mom it's there it's easy to find "she yelled somemore...that irritated me and somewhat hurt my feelings...there i was with my friend and i was only trying to help and there my mom was yelling at me for no good reason...i eventually took over and opened it for her i uttered the simple phrase because of annoyance and a simple fact "i told you it was simple" after that she turned towards me and started hitting me with the heels of her shoe...i was yelling "why mom!!?" "why do you always yell at me!?it hurts!!" dad got angry and hugged her to stop her from hitting me...she struggled a bit and they talked...i was in tears since then... they talked for a bit then dad called me up...i told my mom everything, i poured my heart out all my feelings...what i've wanted to say for a long time...EVERYTHING...dad agreed with me...mom had too much pride, she doesn't care how other's feel when she yells at people, she has a short fuse...and in public places she tends to embarass me and my brothers with her bragging and nagging...

i like it better when dad talks to me except mom...everytime i make a fault...dad talks to me in a sincere manner...he knows how i feel and understands me...i love my dad very much...after our talks im usually in tears but i do learn my lesson everytime...my mom on the other hand...im either left annoyed or more angered inside...

my dad doesn't deserve how my mom treats him...he's loving and caring...he's a good samaritan and he's an all around nice guy...it feels like everyday EVERYDAY mom nags him and yells at him...he talks back in a soft voice and...being the good guy that he is...he backs down eventually...
he asks a simple question...mom yells at him...he does this, mom yells at him...my brothers even know how i feel...they know the pain...dad's heart is always in the right place...he's a great father and...mom treats him like that...he deserves better...

i cant help it...im crying as i write this entry...mom's making it sound like it's my fault...my fault that she packed up and left us a couple hours ago...my fault that i wrecked this family...it hurts...it hurts me badly...is it wrong to help!? did i start it!? what did i do wrong!?

then she's always telling me to put my pride down...learn to cope with others and try to be as friendly as possible...learn to supress my anger...and many more noble actions while she herself doesn't practice them...in fact i've learned a few negative traits from her..after hearing and seeing them day after day..she yells alot...i yell...she has a short temper i have a short temper...at least i know how to supress it...i can only supress it for so long....i seldomly yell at people....and i know when i've hurt someone's feelings....
she also tells me that i need to see a psychiatrist and i have mental issues....now i think it's the other way around....my friends understand me, my brothers understand me, my cousins understand me, my girlfriend understands me, and even my dad understands me....why can't my mom understand me!?
i've pulled away from her along time ago....now she's made it worse...she doesn't realize how badly she's hurt me and the people around her especially my dad...im not the reian she used to know...im not that kid anymore..i've grown and matured...she doesn't understand that...she still treats me like a kid...
as i said i poured my heart out when i talked to her with my dad....i was crying...i was hurt....she still wouldn't listen...she was acting all childish and saying that it was my fault entirely...it was me and dad's fault...she didn't do anything wrong...she kept saying to accept her for who she is...how can we accept someone that hurts us!? more emotionally than physically....

she packed up and left...dad said she had to cool off...she says she's gone for good...is it so much to ask someone to change for the better!? i know the principle of accepting people for they really are but this was too much...harshly way too much...-reian out

Anime News - Blogging Tragedy - theOtaku.com

2005-05-26T18:26:00.000+08:00

Anime News - Blogging Tragedy - theOtaku.com

hmm...this actually is a tragedy...and im amazed how his web journal helped authorities catch the perp..hmm...when i first reads this article...i was shocked...this guy's actaully gone...an "average otaku" a blogger like myself and.....rest easy...fellow blogger.

E3 05'

2005-05-24T13:51:00.000+08:00

ok to start things off this may be a little late for an e3(electronic entertainment expo) post since e3 wrapped up last week almost....but then again...it's my friggin blog so who cares!! hehe

hmm...this isn't my everyday normal post...no inspiration just me writing with a bunch of gamer jargons and adding a little confusion and technicallity to a simple game expectation...hehe
i'll start with some FYIs for some of you people...:D just cuz im a nice guy...
E3 is the "electronic entertainment expo" the largest gaming event of the year held in LA 3 days of gaming heaven...this is where all the sneak previews are all at...concept games...trailers, hands on...the works!! what makes E3 05' special is that...this year that the three new next-gen consoles are finally revieled...
the sony PS3
the Microsoft Xbox 360
the Nintendo Revolution

ok game-wise my e3 list is packed with gaming goodness....

PS2
Metal Gear Solid 3 : Substinence
those of you who are fans of the MGS series...know that MGS3 kicked ass...remember that MGS2:sonso of liberty had a substance version...which is the complete game plus loads of extras....this is similar....but this time we get to PWN other ppl online...snake style!!! w00t!!!

Kingdom Hearts II
yeah....i am a kingdom hearts fan...and i give kudos to square-enix for coming up with such a great concept...disney and final fantasy combine....whoa!!! so the sequel to KH looks tight....and i've seen beautiful screensshots where you play with auron n mulan..o.O...hehe

Namco X Capcom
i dunno what happened but it's like a cross between namco n capcom chars...so u'll see street fighter, tekken, megaman n soul calibur chars in one game...ooh not to mention xenosaga

NGC
The Legend Of Zelda: Twilight Princess
EVERYONE loves Zelda...all the zelda games are fun and great to play....that's why the legend of zelda: the ocarina of time became game of the century.... i saw the trailer for this game last year and it blew me away now that i've seen alot more...im thinking of stealing an NGC just to play this game....oh and if you read this worthless blog...you'd see that on of the pics i posted with link that has the caption "starting anew" is a screencap of zelda:twilight princess

Misc.
Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children
ok this is a dvd that we've been waiting for AGES!!!! it's a sequel to FFVII.....two years after cloud and the gang saved the world....ok here's some screen caps....

i'll think up a title for this one

2005-05-21T19:30:00.000+08:00

im lacking something....i dont know what....im missing something have no idea why...im all confused...im happy but in reality im not...im not crying or anything...im not as sad as before...nothing like that...im confused...

hmm im thinking too much i guess too muc, my mind can't take it...all these thoughts...these voices in my head...im not in pain...mentally nor physically...no..i guess it's spiritually...
trying to keep myself busy but odds are...nothings happening...
i find myself staring at my front page....looking at the address bar not knowing where to go or what to do....
this my friends must be boredom.....
it's like whenever im busy....i find myself doing anything or everything i can think up.....know i have alot of time on my hands...i can't do anything...damn...
hmm...i dont find joy in playing SOCOM II online anymore...nor freestyling on THUG(tony hawk's underground) ...all the things i find joy in before...are long gone...i was simple...now im more complexed...yeah i've grown..alot i guess...hmm...i typed this entry out of boredom...i have a hunger for something which i cannot satisfy...i dunno...why i even bother...writing though...im confused...no one understands me...

2005-05-17T13:38:00.000+08:00

my whole world crashed before me again, i got mad at one of the ya-ya's i yelled at her and of course...i got yelled at aswell....by my parents....

my mom thinks she understands me...she assumes i've got mental issues...no...she doesn't understand me...and i dont have mental issues...if i get mad...i get mad...i can supress the hatred for so long...i need to let it out...this thing with one of the ya-ya's has been bothering me for so long now...
i usually write what i feel when im mad or when im sad...this time, i didn't...you see...my mom doesn't know this...she doesn't know...what i do, what i write...she doesn't know me period...

i can't talk to her freely...i feel uneasy and uncomfortable, i grew up with her contradicting to my every opinion...i get scolded and lectured at...i get intimidated...it pulled me away from her a long time ago....

mom and dad leave us to work....it's admirable, i know it's hard for them to leave their kids go six thousand miles away and work for the sake of their future...
as the kids, we know why and there's nothing we can do to stop them...it's a necessity...plus i know im lucky...i live a great life...i have eveything i

ninja

2005-05-16T22:44:00.000+08:00

What Ninja Class Are You?

Hosted by theOtaku.com: Anime. Done right.

Anime-Kraze.org :: Version 3

2005-05-09T17:44:00.000+08:00

Anime-Kraze.org :: Version 3
ok i tested out another feature and...it looks like i'll be using more of the blog this feature on my google toolbar....
so here's one of my fave fansubs...anime-kraze...i've Dled a few of my early Chrno Crusade eps here and a bunch o' other stuff too...i gotta give props out to my buddy keitarou_the_immortal(his yahoo id) i met kei during my winmx days....he taught me so much torrent stuff...props man!...ok that's all for no...enjoy :)

another poem

2005-05-09T09:31:00.000+08:00

shadows of heart overpower my soul,
standing over me, black as coal...
falling deeper my sorrow is filled,
living lies, my identity killed.

my world crumbles, i watch as it falls
never again shall i stand tall.
happiness is no longer an option for me,
my smiles have died, no laughter nor glee...

i wonder to myself, how come i am sad?
for me being gone,many are glad...
i feel i've wasted almost all my years...
i was happy and smiling and now im in tears.

one person can save me one person so pure,
she brightens me up...she may be my cure.
she made me smile again, her light i can feel...
for with her undying love, my sadness is sealed.

...why??

2005-05-04T13:26:00.000+08:00

Standing still in time using this one moment to look at the past...one restless night gave enough time to ponder my thoughts...let out my sorrow...remember the joy and think about the sixteen years i've lived...

im a guy that has two worlds (as my 2nd grade teacher tells me) i have the philippines and the united states...i have family in both countries...i've gone to school here and there...and believe me...go school after school after school...it's tough...to lose friends...some might even be forever...
im not mad or anything...it's just that i want to share this...so my lifes pretty rough...my parents working there...knowing the "truth" about my dad, not seeing dad for at least half a year because he and mom work for our better future...
they say a good life has sacrifices...guess that was it...

me growing up...it's alright...i have friends i have family...i have support...

i pondered on the birthdays i've had...big deal i grow a year older...how can this year be different?...usually we have a party...i stopped that when i was 10...now it's either going out or family time...+ the usual blowout with friends...
how could this year be any different?...

i thought about my academics too...im pretty average...the kid that gets high marks...then loses interest...yeah...im kinda like most of you guys out there...

all the choices i've made...the good, the bad and the stupid ones...all the "what if's" "whys?" and "how comes" keep popping up...was eveything worth it?...those dumb times i've had with other people...where i humiliate myself...were those even necessary?...

as of now...this very moment...i feel sad...i dont have a reason to be it's weird...i was uber happy yesterday...and suddenly..boom...i started feeling blue...

it feels like something inside me is telling me that im this big burden...
im worthless to my parents...im a bad brother...im an outcast among my friends...im lazy...it's like every who gets near me...turns miserable...
the pain i feel in realizing this...unbearable...im heartbroken...and the sad part of it is...it true...i see proof...i know proof...

was i just an accident?...did my mom take pity on me when i was a baby?..is that why i am here?...
when was the last time i've made my parents proud of me?...long time...i've been scolded, humiliated and yelled at a million times more than being praised...

i feel so miserable..so dark...i want it to end...i have the power to end it...i can take my own life away at any time...it wouldn't harm anyone...everyone wins...i lose my pain...they lose me...
wishes like "i wish i was never born" often fill my thoughts...im not needed...im like this walking chunk of paper weight...i might add to more of this later...
i need to think more...

you know that feeling...

2005-04-28T06:27:00.000+08:00

to start things off with this entry...probably you know how it feels to have deep feelings for someone right?the feeling of love, that warm fuzzy feeling you get when being with her, the moments you act stupid, simply because of the fact that you are uber happy at that moment.....simply wonderful isnt it? yeah...of course!

it's like every waking moment...you think about her...every second you are apart....you miss her...everyday you're together...you love her...^_^

it's like what this one movie said..."she's is my other half, together we're whole, so once you know how it feels to be whole you never want to go back to being a half" (well im not sure actually if that's the precise quote but heck i typed from my memory) i was like yeah she completes me...i've never been this happy in my life actually...
the fact that you know that there is this special someone that loves you, that cares for you, that misses you...gives you a reason to live...if possible live the rest of it with her....

it's not my type to make a mushy entry actually...well i did this just because the 28th is a very special day for me..:D

actually this is the first time i've actually "fallen"...it's like i feel different about her...this deep connection..unlike the others...it's irony/coincidence(im not sure because if i say it's destiny it's kinda corny) same star sign, same birth month, same interests, we're like identical inside but different on the outside...like my friend said that she is my female counterpart...and that time i was like "what!? who!?..nahh!"...pretty funny...and look where i am now....i love her! :D
i feel great and now im anout to wrap up this post...ok my final words...

tricia, i love you!!! and happy monthsary! :D

skin change....

2005-04-27T10:18:00.000+08:00

im thinking about changing my blog template...i dunno if i should proceed in making my own...or i'll just rip one out of blogskins

my candidiates in the skins i've seen so far are :
(click the linkis for previews)

kakashi 1
this is a simple hatake kakashi skin...green and has a big hatake kakashi pic with his visible sharingan..kinda cool

gundam seed
a great skin!! a kickass entrance and an animewebsite look....great pictures of the freedom gundam and has it's own avatars and stuff too...im not sure but i might use this is build my own customizations through the great layout...it's because i stink when it comes to layout >.<

sephiroth*
i've used this before and i might use it again....

squall - i need silence *
ok this is a little light for me but it's pretty cool...nice layout with the drop-downs and stuff...another candidate

*BROKEN LINKS (sorry for the inconvinience)

dreaming...

2005-04-17T13:11:00.000+08:00

what are dreams? are dreams images that flash before our eyes when we sleep, memories
that play and reflect through our subconsciousness? dreaming is a state of imagining it also serves as a goal one we can accomplish in life....

dreams aren't childish well technically we dream almost every night...we dream of the future what we want...what we could wish for...yeah i dream all the time....
thinking about the past and looking forward to the future....dreaming of my memories and living up to my expectations in life.

you could be the kid who wants everything :"I want everything"
you could be the kid who wants to be somebody: "someday, the whole world will know my name"
you could be the kid who has something to prove: " i have something to prove"
you could be the kid who wants true love: " when will she come?", " when will he come?"
or
you could be like me: " i wanna see my name on the credits of some video game"

yeah i dream that...over and over..something i need to accomplish,something i need to prove something to fuel my faith, my self confidence, well that's my dream

nothing's childish...some of the greatest people who ever walked this earth...dreamt when they were just children...those dreams fueled their minds in helping them achieve whatever they accomplished... my friends dont forget...they went down in history as remarkable beings...

dreams are dreams...no defenite explanation but yeah....dreams are dreams

you can believe in fairy tales...heck nothing's wrong with that...dreaming that your genie will grant you your every wish...saving your damsel in distress...slaying your dragon...saving the world even.it wont exactly have all its "FANTASY" but in a modern sense it is possible...
nothing's ever childish about dreams, they are yours to create and yours to fullfill, no one and i say NO ONE has the right to take that away from you...

later!

My life is in all shades of Blue...

2005-04-14T11:42:00.000+08:00

My life is in all shades of Blue...

hehe ok...i tested out this "blog this" feature (located on the blogger toolbar) heeh and who better to test this out on than tricia!! :D hehe...i love this blog(and the person) hehe....it's all in blue.....bluish....bluey...(ok dont mind the terms) i know this gal like i know me....and all her posts are meaningful....all her rants are logical...and her template....simple yet advanced....look at all those scripts!! hehe kudos on the template and a-spec points with the posts....keep it up trish!!!

that fine line between romance and friendship

2005-04-11T14:04:00.000+08:00

friends are friends...best buds, cliques...whatever you call your's...like i call mine alphabeto..friends are friends...and you cant change that

friends are great to have around...they make us who we are...they comfort us...we really enjoy being with them...everyone has friends...
everyday hanging out...doing happy-nonsense...doing useless fun stuff...hanging out at their houses everyday...every second...planning...playing...all those stuff you do with your friends...irreplaceable...seems like the bonding you guys have...unbreakable...right?..yup it is unbreakable....but it is WEAKENED...or something like that...

now this is where my entry really comes into perspective...

believe it or not i got the idea of writing this entry...when i watched the lion king 3...yeah...a great message of friendship...plus ironically...my friendster horoscope said something about this....

that fine line between romance and friendship

ok...back to the friendship thingy...your bond with your friends...as i said is unbreakable...friends are forever..dont forget that...although it is weakened...especially when your friend...starts having a relationship...a much deeper relationship with someone else...

im not saying that this is a bad thing...as a friend, you MUST be happy for him or her....but sooner or later...you'll realize...things arent what they used to be...
all the attention THAT was focused on YOU...is now focused on his or her special someone...and that's pretty devastating on your part...cuz you were happy and thought that nothing can go wrong, no one can get in the way...but...you were wrong someone DID get in the way...

i've felt it...and it kinda bothered me...but it got better through time...it's like this gap...for now he wants to spend time with her...and only her...and now i can only feel happy for them...

although now it's the other way around...i mean...now it seems that..i dont want to spend time with them...i want to spend time with her...and..only her... so a message for my boys...if any of you ever get to read this...you'll know how i felt before...and you MUST know how i feel now...

this gets better through time...i know...i've seen the final product...ok not exactly the final product but you get my point...

this is all i can write right now...i'll add stuff soon...

what type of mythical sprite?

2005-04-09T22:53:00.000+08:00

Unique, mystical, insightful and beautiful
You are a Snow sprite. Mysterious, and alluring you
naturally attract people to you, your like a
people magnet even though you most often wish
to be alone. Your love for cold climates and
snow has given you an insight into the beauty
few see. While most see bland white you see a
forest or blanket of sparkling white beauty. To
you life is something precious and you intend
to figure out its mysteries. You are very
mature and don't waste your intelligence on
childish games or people not worth your time
which can make you seem arrogant at times but
you are really just intent on saving your time
for better things. Your soul is very beautiful
if not a little shut up, you keep your emotions
hidden from everyone and therefore they don't
know what your capable of. You are a living
fantasy.

.::=What type of Mythical Sprite are you?=::. -With Anime Pictures and detailed answers-
brought to you by Quizilla

summer...

2005-04-09T11:51:00.000+08:00

a time to think a time for me...yeah..right now im all alone...listenin to music...thinking about stuff...and the thing is it's my brother's bday...
summer's here, the unbearable heat, all the swimming plans everyone has...hangin out...everyday(everyday!? so why am i here!?).everyone's dream summer is...pure fun...no problems no school just fun

a summer entry....how interesting....

summer's what you want it to be....you can make it :

a.dull - stay home and rot

b.productive - take up summer courses to polish up on skillz *i did that (the very foundation of my skillz)*

c.outgoing - go everywhere but home

d.friendly - best way to do it....GO TO CAMP!

e.adventurous - go places...do stuff...exotic maybe

d.expensive - get out of the country....or buy a country...or just spend spend spend in the country

e.studious - two words : SUMMER SCHOOL

f.profitable - two words again: summer job

g.happy - spend it your own way without the other choices hehe or better yet mix em all up without letter "E"

yeah summer's a great season....well all the greatness it has is the simple fact of not having no school....but summer's not complete with the letters F-U-N...that's simply my way of putting it.although there is a down side to everything...even summer vacation!
i mean a being there is one thing but...knowing that youneed to be there...that's something else...summer'll lose mojo if you're somewhere you dont belong...my point is you don't go somewhere you dont like and stay there for a long period of time right?

in my case knowing where you belong is paramount...
like my parents wanted me to go to the US to work for obvious reasons...but i wanted to stay here....because i know i belong here why? cuz of my friends...what friends? MY FRIENDS hehe...so i did stay here.
the sense of being where you belong...knowing when to blend in helps you adapt but the feeling of you never needing to blend in...yeah...that's a Big thumbs up in life...it's like you can live practically anywhere but you only have one home...and that home is where you ultimately (yeah keep an eye out for the term)ultimately belong...as for the others....SHELTER is the proper term i believe...for short i know i belong here...not the US...

on the other hand, one friend's case is different...he lives south WAY south lyk it takes 3 hrs from our place to their place so he lives there...and belongs there too (duh! his family's there) but he comes back here...stays at our house...he did for almost a month he has two homes in my books...he's sorta ..well not sorta...he IS a brother to me...so...i guess you can have two homes too...he belongs there with his family...and has a spot here at our place....

now my other friend...whom is very dear to me....she (so it's obvious now hehe)almost had to go somewhere far far away(not exactly like star wars but you get my point) which isn't that big of a deal cuz it's SUMMER!! but the thing is...it wasn't her choice which is painful, her dad wanted it...and without letting her decide..isn't fair...lucky thing her mom backed her up and eventually convinced her dad not to make her go...she knew she didn't belong there and her summer was almost ruined cuz of that...and summer's supposed to be for us...kinda. take summer into ur own hands and have fun

as i said earlier...summer is what you make it to be...and the state of belongingness is a big big factor...so happy vacation...i guess...

dunno if im talking in riddles..or anything...it's just something i felt i had to write about....ok till next time

element quiz...actually pretty cool

2005-04-07T20:14:00.000+08:00

I took this elemental quiz....i actually likedit...it's kinda neat....so uhmm here i'll share it :D

Your element is Water: Understanding, intelligent,
quiet and calm. You know who you are and no one
can change that. Usually quiet but only because
your listening, don't let anyone think you
haven't got an opinion! Your not quiet because
your shy or sad, your usually quiet because
your thinking. Your answers are well planned
and helpful so people generally seek your
advice. Your the perfect balance between
solitary and outgoing. But sometimes you need a
little time to yourself to sort out your
emotions and figure things out. You understand
the phrase 'sticks and stone' and rarely let
things get to you, whats that important for you
to have to get so upset over? You know what you
want out of life but are simply taking your
time and enjoying things. To you your life is
fine as it is, you can always change things
later if your not happy.

.:-What is your true element?-:. -With Anime Pictures and detailed answers-
brought to you by Quizilla

2005-04-02T14:59:00.000+08:00

Suikoden II's Riou...bearer of the bright shield rune...uhmmun that's all for now....im bored..

a poem by me

2005-04-02T12:25:00.000+08:00

as darkness rises,my sadness reigns
my soul is haunted my anger gains
im so lost waiting for answers of life
ending one's sorrow, my blood on the knife

the fear of death's great,one which i overcome
i embrace my ending moments, and maybe missed by some
a sacrifice to sorrow, my life about to end
for god said not now, and a messenger he sends

it was you of all people, my darkness turns to day
my life now has a purpose,i have so much left to say
about my past and present,my future it can wait
you taught me how to love,you took away my hate

my shattered soul in shadows a light it now bares
completes my inner being, i feel your utmost care
my life i now value, for you are dear to me
i really really love you i wish that you can see

i'll never leave your side, i'll never leave you dear
keeping every promise, holding every tear
you're my source of living, you're my source of might
i whisper that i love you as i hold you close tonight...

simple designs

2005-03-31T09:29:00.000+08:00

everything in life has a different meaning, a different purpose, each individual endowed with his and her own destiny...chosen for the sole purpose of fullfilling that said destiny...

(i've been watching too much anime)

yeah...the cycle of life actually revolves around these principles (that's what i think)...there's a greater purpose for everything. who we meet, what we do and why we do it, what we like...all fragments of a much bigger plan...like turning down a huge offer..just to be happy. choosing your friends no matter what others think, loving someone even when your family disagrees...all a part of a bigger plan...the plan of life...

hmm...when you spill milk all over the table, that must have a meaning right?...(ooookaaay *sarcasm*)

think about it, why are we here?...why of all people we were made offsprings of our parents? why do we choose our friends? why of all people we were given this special someone to love? why? why? WHY!?

see, all our mistakes, all our achievements and all our goals fit into this puzzle we call life. we are who we are, we become who we become, our designs are laid out, we simply build them. like he was destined to become president, the other a doctor they had other plans for their life no one expected them to become who they are now but, we cannot stop our God given plan, no matter what happens...

everything and I MEAN EVERYTHING has a higher purpose... no matter how small. a small change in one's path may alter his or her destiny, like sharing a cookie with the wrong or right person may change one's life. joining a character portrayal contest, looking outside at the wrong moment, being online at 3am...

i know this totally contradicts with my past posts, as i said, we are who we choose to be...but everything changes, i change aswell. we dream our life and we build through that dream, our actions are always accounted for, everything sequenced. every move, every decision.

like hope for example, people at times suffer, they are miserable and unfortunate, HOPE, is a go signal to look at the brighter things in life and make a name for yourself, for with that HOPE an individual fuels one spirit, to carry out is purpose and follow his destined path...

I on the other hand have not yet found my so-called "plan"...although im living it right now, i've found that i have a great purpose for living, now it's my duty to live it to its fullest
-peace out

2005-03-26T20:45:00.000+08:00

starting anew...
Posted by Hello

Graduation...

2005-03-06T14:02:00.000+08:00

Graduation's coming in.....fast, all the pressure i get from exams, thesis and grades...may have lead me to my downfall, ...my heart is pounding fast...im thinking...is this really it!?

It's supposed to be a day of laughter and tears...my part, it's really only a day for tears and parting with people we either have known for our whole lives or...a simple 4 years in time...no matter how long we've known a person, saying goodbye...leaving a place in your heart, a place of memories a place for laughter and a place for tears...is the hardest thing in the world...

My story...i know i've met lots of people...miss lots of friends...been to different places and thinking that this is one of those times...like from my childhood...me starting over...a new world... well, back then i thought "heck i've felt it before...no biggie" but NO! it's more than that, the connection i've built among my fellow jamers, it's irreplaceable...the feeling of simply letting all that go away and...never to be repeated again...i can't imagine...
...I DONT WANT THIS TO END!!!!!!!!

leaving my alma matter...i'll leave...a peice of me...a peice of my heart and my soul...

no matter what happens to me, no matter where i go, whoever i become...im still a jamer...i'll always be the reian that grew up within the campus of SJA..for four years...that happy guy....always laughing and smiling...the gamer, the "techno-god".

the mixed emotions i feel in my last days...are a cluster of feelings...anger, sorrow, bliss...all compiled together in a ball...ready to hurl...im scared...of the outcome too...

im not ready...i know im not...im content...im happy...im in love and...i feel great....then...BOOM!!!...im out...starting all over...

i dont know if im too pessimistic.....maybe im too blue to think...it's just....parting is TOO soon....

Eventually...we all need to move on...eventually i'll get over this and stop living in the past...always think of the present and most of all the future...because the future is something we should always look forward to....

to all my friends..who get the chance to read this....thank you and...i'll never forget you guys...although grad is still a week away...it's better to do this now before i lose my chance....

i dont like goodbyes....goodbyes are...so painful and heartbreaking....so...for my parting words...instead of goodbye...it's better for me to say "see ya all later" ....later and see you all sometime soon....

long live SJA batch 04-05.....long live!!...

i took time off for this....

2005-01-12T10:14:00.000+08:00

ok Intrams is a big deal...well our teams eliminated in basketball so...i didn't go to school today :
(i didn't see the point in going)

nah...our volleyball teams and basketball girls team can still make it...plus all the in-door games...but for me i took time off the Intramurals to contemplate...or chill before the whole frenziness of the 4th quarter starts...

i dunno if i should write my normal bullshit or go...umm...inspirational....otherwise i'll just write from experience...im kinda dissapointed...cause...my teamates didn't give me a chance in showing what i can do :...that's ok with me ...as long in that short period of play time i had fun ^_^

that's it for now...i got somewhere to go so...maybe i'll post more next time..

1st day blues

2005-01-10T20:23:00.000+08:00

Intramurals 2005 is a BIG event...practically the biggest event of the year.....one week...pure competition, no holds barred...one section...united in victory and defeat...the very week where a section's oneness is tested...to the limit...

Intramurals is currently going on...1st day is done...me playing basketball...good but still needs of course practice...
practically lost all our games

my opinions and shit :
to tell ya the truth...that 3-4 mins of me playing...gave me a rush of adrenaline...the adrenaline of the crowd watching...my team spirit...pumping out...it was amazing! too bad...damn...they thought i wasn't of any help...:...i was giving my all...teammates...just couldn't appreciate it : (well some...im not saying all...ok more like 2-3 almost)

all in all...i was pushed ( i can't say to the limit cuz i didn't play long) but my morale booster (whoever or whatever u are) gave me this sense that i DO belong here and we are all aiming for the same thing...a small chance for victory...

the funny thing...me and my fellow...st.james basketball boys team...all know it is a longshot in getting the gold (St.Catherine practically has it in the bag) we even thought of having a slim shot for one win...but as one section...we didn't let that get in the way of fun...the feeling of playing alongside ur classmates...competing with schoolmates...and that unexplainable feeling...that my friends...is the spirit of intramurals....till next time!

taken for granted?

2004-12-29T13:12:00.000+08:00

my life has entered the so-called "phase I" stage of adulthood...the stage where i mature spiritually...mentally and physically...

younger years swiftly passed by.....my moments on the tire swing, monkey bars, tee ball and kick ball even...gone....engraved in my heart...moments i will never forget...
kindergarten friends, the early years of elementary my first teachers....gym class...the reason i love PE...yeah memories never forgotten...memories i longed for but cannot go back...
new chapters are popping up constantly....blank pages...where time does all the writing...we ourselves simply fill in the blanks...
as we grow old...our book of life grows thicker and thicker....writing...turning...never closing...engraving the names of friends...loved ones...and enemies along the way...

Life has no meaning itself...but it's a wonderful feeling...

im no action star...no sports hero...im a normal filipino highschool student...but with the media clouding my thoughts of glamour and fame...what the heck have i done to my life!?
i just might be forgetting one thing,....you are who you choose to be...i can strive to be an actor if i really wanted to...i could own people in any sport if i really wanted to...but no....i chose this...i chose writing...i chose self-expression...being a gamer...audiophile (another term for music lover)...and anime lover...these are the sources of my opinions...my emotions..my perspective in life...where i get my inspiration in writing what i love...doing what i do...and doing my best in what i do ^_^.

im sweet sixteen and before i know it...my teenage life is gone...over...kapput...finished...gone forever...now...doing what i do...i don't know if i can say that i've wasted half my life with anime, music, friends, video games..when i could be studying or working just like my other classmates.....yeah im filled with privileges...i've been to numerous countries..been to disneyland..at least 8 states..i've been endowed with the latest technology...have wonderful friends a loving family...

but being the person that i am...have i taken those amazing things for granted?...were they all for nothing?

maybe yes...maybe no...but one thing's certain....they helped me become the person i am today..im no varsity...im no scholar...im nothing special either...im not any of those.....im reian

the gamer within...

2004-12-26T13:13:00.000+08:00

hmm...been catching up with my games lately and these are my thoughts...(i just gotta post this)

ok yeah been busy (yeah busy) im like on addict mode with video games the gamer inside of me just popped up like crazy!! actually this post really focuses on one game...that's Metal Gear Solid 3 :Snake Eater, ok ok maybe the whole Metal Gear and Metal Gear Solid series...

MGS is this complexed series...complexed story...well the gameplay's awesome and the graphics are amazing...but still Hideo Kojima(the creator of MGS) has put in some sentimental values that blew me away!

the first one (MGS) it gave me this value about life...the future...and passing on what is our legacy...the value of life, making our life worthwhile and doing what you were meant to do...

Son's of Liberty(MGS2) on the other hand showed me how to build the future...preserve the past...living the life you adore so much...doing what you believed in...being the person you are and most of all never forgetting who we are inside...we can never be another person...staying true and pure...that's what really matters

Snake Eater (MGS3) although i haven't gone through it entirely...made me think about my principles and building one's emotion...having the sense of justice....sense of purity..doing what we all think is right.

ok you must think im crazy now...but these are my building blocks...where i find my joy...my values...and even some inspiration...
fans of this series must agree with me...i know we all felt the same thing...
this is a powerful form of lecture plus...as we play we learn other principles...and view the world through a variety of perspectives...unleasing the beauty of communication...

though life does not have a meaning itself..it does have a soul and with that we can find all the joy of life...cuz with that soul...that spirit...the so-called "life" that makes us who we are
we find the reasons why we live...why we fight, why we love and why do we never stop doing what we love to do...doing what we are all meant to do..doing what makes life significant...

my very last christmas party...

2004-12-22T01:50:00.000+08:00

the annual school christmas party...is the day where you get to show angst, booyaness(riight booyaness?...) well you get to show off and shit...but in a good christmas spirit way... some ppl are broke some ppl are happy....but one thing's fo'sho...it's a happy happy day of celebration and....yeah i got presents and i was giving presents too

ok, in case you didn't know....im a highschool senior so this christmas party...may as well be my last... well yeah it's my last but...i wouldn't say i went all-out...(it's 12 midnight and i just got home hehe), so technically, the 21st of December, the day of my last christmas party....finally ended.

So yeah you bet im gonna post about this momentous day ^_^ ok, it all started well of course this morning...i woke up kinda late (intentionally cuz i have this rep on being fashionably late) i took my headphones off and got ready (BTW, i listen to rock when i sleep) well i really didn't know what to wear but....even though my shirt was gonna piss religious ppl i wore it....my "VIRIGNITY IS NOT DIGNITY (printed on front) IT'S JUST LACK OF OPPURTUNITY (printed on back)" and whoah....i was astonished, all the attention my shirt had and stuff (well when u think of it the saying's hilarious) ppl saying nice shirt, it's so true and asking where you got it? and for me...making ppl laugh is a great feeling...:D hmm well i came to school with one priority....get musicmatch on the class pc and save all the mp3s i burnt.....so i was like this music godsend :D...even tho our pc was being a bitch but neways....i got the pc fixed and my soundtrack were bangin....plus...was runnin everywhere to give out presents and all the ppl who love me gave presents too :D so all in all i had fun just like any other christmas party...

well my day doesn't stop there tho...in preparation for our game tomorrow "Bash Wednesday" Alphabeto vs. Team Phils. 10am-1pm Concepcion Plaza we played basketball from 1-3 pm (that's why i went home early) so yeah we got tired and stuff plus my legs were sore...so after the game Mer said "Star City tau" hehe so Me, Namay, Jenus, Carlo, and Mer went to my place(i needed cash i only got 3 on me) and..we were off to star city , well i had to bring my two young bros. cuz with them around i get more money ^_^....after bball--->star city....whooo!!!!
yeah the trip was fast....we got there faster than expected....thank god for my street smarts well i guess we all pitched in....

when we got there, we had the modus operandi *snickers* right guys!? ok we headed towards a small coaster that blizzard thingy...we got cut off so...mer and jenus didn't get to ride with us...we had fun ...then we went into this funny horror house we were laughing our asses off!! DUDE WE EVEN SAW FPJ!!! after that we ate and began our cunning plan *hehe* then we rode the xclone loop for 4 straight times....^_^ hehe the 1st time my 2 bros were too scared to ride...the 2nd time my youngest bro...we forced him to ride...when he was practially sitting in the car and was already locked up...he was crying and yelling that he wanted to get out...but after the loop he went whoo!! now my other brother...we forced him on the 3rd time..we problems there..he had fun too...and the 4th and final ride...i was feeling something in my leg...after the first huge drop i was having LEG CRAMPS!!! damn so unlucky!! when we headed towardsthe loop i wasn't holdin on to any railing...i was holding on to my leg!!!..my left leg is still aching...we saw other seniors there too but we each had our own plans.

ok we went into some more haunted houses and scared the shit out of some girls and we went on more rides we strolled, and bought stuff....then karma kicked in

my mom was supposed to pick us up * it was coding so she couldn't bring us* and we brought walkie talkies in case some of us got separated...so armed with mer's and carlo's low batt cells we decided to go home...ok my mom had another walkie talkie so if ever they're near...they'd radio us...jenus was in a hurry to go home (family issue) so we strolled around waiting for a radio and or text...for some time during our enjoyment, someone radioed us (the voices sounded like my mom and our driver) so we got out....but a text came in and said that they were still at navotas cuz of traffic...DAMN A GUY WITH THE SAME FREQUENCY!!! i was so pissed...

remember from a 2 hour basketball game we headed straight for star city...five of us were beat. so we tried to contact our fetchers as much as possible (jenus was panicking) but eventually....the cells died... so we were left with our walkie talkies and our street charm... we couldn't go back into star city, so we decided to go to the baywalk...after much radio buzzing...and talking to many ppl we eventually saw the van and headed home...

karma kicked in (can i still call it today?) but we had fun-fun....it was worth it and that was my last christmas party...

it's christmas time again...

2004-12-18T22:53:00.000+08:00

Its Christmas time, again Its time to be nice to the people you cant stand, all year Im growing tired of all this Christmas cheer You people scare mePlease stay away from my homeIf you dont wanna get beat down Just leave the presents and then leave me alone

ahh the christmas season is getting closer and closer...more giving more caring and more presents...plus the bunjee jumping baby jesus (im going to hell for that ACK!)...
christmas for me is...spending time with the family...a day of good times and no worries...yeah...i love this season.
yeah this season compared to valentines...is the REAL day for love...the day jesus(not the bunjee jumping one from Late Night) but the bethlehem born godlike one (im so going to hell for this), It's this day of unity and a day where all are differences are taken away...that feeling gets better year by year :D.
here, the states...man the holiday season is like the biggest season of the year and this year 04' it's gonna be huge...
no matter what the difference in race, color, nationality..this season brings us all together...

Now im here to tell what christmas is about for me...i could say it straight to the point that it's all about the presents but that wouldn't bring justice to this post hehe...
but instead....christmas is a time for showing off and being the envy of all your friends (WTF!? strike 3 reian) nah nah...for real....the holiday season is about family and tradition, the tradtional meal, the reunion...the gift giving, going to church...TURKEY, horsin around with shadow(well not nowadays cuz she's huge), coco and buster..., my lil bros leaving cookies and milk for santa at my grandparent's fireplace, my older cousins being surprised that someone gave them an Xbox 3 years ago...no one admitted who did it (it must've been santa)...ahh those were memorable moments...
I was looking at past christmas photos last night and i laughed at some of the things i had....from barney stuff(now i despise that evil rabid purple dinosaur) to powerangers to nintendo games to the ps2 and ps2 games...now an ipod(i wish) and stuff :D
I remember when my dad and i chopped down an christmas tree once...damn that was hilarious...i was 6 and i was scared to death...and my grandfather whom i call pop always has this HUGE train set set up in the living room...one kiddie like (for kids to play) and this big one (a collectable expensive one) that goes around the living room...so cool...
now that's the thomas family during christmas...well i forgot to mention the part at dinner where my mom makes these awesome quebabs....my two cousins (those are my only 1st cousins at my dad's side we're like brothers when we hang out....even though we see em like once a year) kevin and brian...love em...they argue(well not anymore) about who gets the last one,HILARIOUS (im dead if they read this!!*gulp*)

now over here in the philippines...well you must know all the traditions, like the simbang gabi, kids carolling and stuff...it's an awesome colorful christmas....every one experiences the same thing...the JOY of christmas...no further ellaborations :p

hmm...now the thing that my family does differently is...we open our presents a night early!! :D we ALWAYS open em on christmas eve it's thomas family tradition...we've been doing it longer than i can remember....so that feels special for me...:D

ok since im making an christmas post i might as well write to santa:

Dear St. Nick,
I've been a good boy (define good) and all i want for christmas is for my dad to have a safe flight home...that's all i want...and merry christmas!

p.s oh and an ipod too...i want one of those silver ones (i messed with santa ACK!)

-love,
reian

breathe no more....

2004-12-17T23:04:00.000+08:00

an inspirational and sad song by Evanescence

I've been looking in the mirror for so long
That I've come to believe my soul's on the other side
All the little pieces fallen, shatter
Shards of me, too sharp to put back together
Too small to matter
But big enough to cut me into so many little pieces
If I try to touch her and I bleed, I bleed
And I breathe, I breathe no more
Take a breath and I try to draw from my spirit's well
Yet again you refuse to drink like a stubborn child
Lie to me, convince me that I've been sick forever
And all of this will make sense when I get better
I know the difference between myself and my reflection
I just can't help but to wonder
Which of us do you love so I bleed, I bleed
And I breathe, I breathe no
Bleed, I bleed
And I breathe, I breathe
I breathe, I breathe no more
-www.letssingit.com(who said i didn't learn anything from research!)

the difference between...

2004-12-17T16:59:00.000+08:00

you ever thought about the things you are supposed to do and the things you were meant to do?

that's the wonder of life...God's almighty plan...it's also known as DESTINY, we can't determine such events, yet it pops up at the most unexpected situations...
some people experience it through death, luck...and sorrow even...
"i wanna do this i wanna do that but instead i did something completely unexpected...that shocked me and my family"... can i call that destiny?... "i had a huge crush on her since grade school but i ended up loving...someone different" is that a case of fate?...
...i have no idea why im talking about this ....really...

but in god's given plan....do i have more to hope for?...more to conquer?...ppl say that after happiness comes sorrow, and after sorrow comes happiness....Im VERY happy now and i admit i am REALLY lucky....but will regret the feeling of joy now and suffer in the future?...that'll be the day i fear most...

all the joyous days of senior year are numbered....less than 3 months and counting....damn i wish i could stop time...the triumphant days of batch 2005...soon draws to an end...
it's so hard to believe that 3 years ago i was in the lower year levels...I-Blessed Raymond (ok 3 years ago SJA's raymund....we called it raymond FYI for u underlings ^_^) under the wings of Mr.Michael M. Mercado i give you kudos sir!, 2 years II-St.Margaret under Mrs.Aldea...damn those were the days the dawn of the 3rd floor era ^_^ and just this past school year III-Mo.Francisca under the veteran Gng.Nuqui...now im IV-St.James(booya i got the rep of the school in my sec) under barrotti (hehe mrs.nancy barrot)...damn my highschool batteries are running out and im not ready to go yet...i've met so many friends...my batchmates all the lower years and all the teachers whom nourished my knowledge...they all have this special place in my soul...they made me who i am...watched as i grow...watch as i leave...though my body is away...my spirit always stays...
my barkada....my beloved barkada...ALPHABETO...it's so sad that we...the group who thought they were inseperable....finally....have different paths to take.
aped,pando,enchong,namay,von,enus,jd,mer, gui aka kuntil, al and me...(eff,or rf whatever ^_^)
still 3 months away but i feel 3 months is not enough....

again i ask...you know the difference between what you want to do and what you're supposed to do...is it fate that i've met so many ppl and shared practically my whole being during my highschool days that 3 months from now i'll be forced to let them go...instantly?....
life is cruel, fate is spontaneous and my life has only just begun.....

2004-12-15T21:25:00.000+08:00

this is pretty awkward for me to do but here goes...

ok i got exams tomorrow and right now im feeling a wee confident and stuff but, i keep having this thought that tells me that my hardest isn't hard enough...

is it cuz im forced to do thing that surpass my capabilities since im (accidentally) included in the CREAM section?? damn i feel so inferior compared to them and it makes me feel VERY and i mean VERY insecure...
do i need to change who i am ( the person inside which many of my friends adore) just to fit it? hell no!! i know i'll still remain the charming (yeah) happy person outside, the music loving, laptop weilding, net junkie, gaming guru that i am...
well i still remain the same person outside but...i've changed inside...looking back at past posts (not in this blog cuz i post shit here but on forums) i saw how childish my words are and...all the typos i made..(ick!)...i look at my past works in school and compared them to my work now...i change every year...i grow more and more, bit by bit...
i went on this retreat (it's like this badass spiritual thingy sorta like camp but ...y' know...spiritual) last month and it gave me a new perspective in life...i had a chance to listen to my friends' stories and i saw how lucky i really am...i mean this girl...yeah she was REALLY smart and she got all this attention at school and stuff...but she had a broken heart and said..."my family doesn't really appreciate me.."
and that was VERY shocking...VERY...c'mon...all that attention in school and no attention from your own family...harsh reality, im lucky...yeah i do ONLY get average grades and sometimes lower...but i know im lucky and that there are people in my life who like me for who i am...for what i do...i got loving parents, awesome brothers and bonded friends..i wouldn't ask anything more...i know i don't have to be in or pressured...being different...sticking out and most of all being yourself..that's what really matters most